Buffy Summers' main romantic relationships were with the vampiresAngel and Spike. Buffy always sought deep, committed relationships rather than casual bonds; unfortunately, she was most often drawn to dangerous or unobtainable men. While discussing a painful reunion with Angel with her friend Willow Rosenberg, Buffy remarked: "Isn't that where the fire comes from? Can a nice, safe relationship be that intense? I know it's nuts, but part of me believes that real love and passion have to go hand in hand with pain and fighting."[1] Her Watcher, Rupert Giles, also commented that Buffy's connection with Angel and Spike was quite poetic, as she, a Vampire Slayer, had her truest relationships with members of sworn enemy's species. Buffy's attitude toward romance changed with time as she grew more mature and decided not to be dependent on men. When broached by a jealous Angel about her growing relationship with Spike, Buffy admitted to him that she wasn't ready for a real, long-term relationship, and came to the conclusion that she was still growing up and getting to know herself..[2] She became much less active in her romantic life since Sunnydale's destruction, as she was focused on other pursuits.
In the past, Buffy was romantically linked to sarcastic slacker Oliver Pike, whom she met shortly before discovering her identity as the Slayer.[3] Although they initially hated one another, as Buffy's superficial valley girl perspective clashed with Pike's ethics, the two grew closer after losing friends to Lothos and his minions, and Pike eventually aided Buffy in her defeat of the vampire king. He eventually broke up with Buffy, believing that their relationship put both of them in danger.
Throughout her life, Buffy made several attempts at "normal" relationships with high school boys, like Owen Thurman and Scott Hope, with but her status as the Slayer always got in the way. Instead, she found herself drawn to the mysterious Angel, an older man who warned her of impending danger in the early days of their relationship. After Angel unintentionally revealed he was a vampire, Buffy briefly sought to kill him, but then discovered that he was unique among his kind for possessing a soul. The unlikely pairing of a vampire and Slayer was often commented on.[4] Buffy eventually lost her virginity to Angel, which caused the curse that had restored his soul to be broken. Buffy woke up alone the next day and was soon attacked by the soulless Angelus, providing a metaphor for the real-life situation of a boy who doesn't call a girl the "morning after" they share a sexual encounter. Angelus tormented Buffy, and although her witch friend Willow Rosenberg was able to restore his soul with magic, Buffy was forced to sacrifice him to stop the world from being drawn into hell. Emotionally destroyed, Buffy left Sunnydale for several months to come to terms with her grief. Shortly after her return, Angel inexplicably reappeared on Earth. Buffy nursed him back to health and the two had an unstable romance until they were forced to admit the obvious limitations of their relationship.[5] Angel realized that he was preventing Buffy from leading a normal life, and left Sunnydale for Los Angeles. He returned on a number of occasions to help her, and though both eventually tried to move on, they still retained strong love for each other.
Following Angel's departure, Buffy made a failed attempt at romance by having an impulsive one-night-stand with college student Parker Abrams.[6] She was devastated when Parker later ignored her and revealed that he only wanted to have a "good time." After recovering, she was pursued by Riley Finn, a soldier and member of the Initiative. Although Riley sacrificed his career, body and friends to be with Buffy, he grew frustrated with her unwillingness to be truly open and vulnerable with him, admitting to a surprised Xander Harris that although Buffy was like no other person he had ever met, she didn't love him.[7] Riley also felt inferior next to Angel, a fact that Spike was able to deduce when he claimed that Buffy could only truly love men with darkness in their hearts.[8] Despite his efforts to understand Buffy, she and Riley slowly drifted apart, and he eventually left Sunnydale to rejoin the military.
Shortly after Riley left, Buffy learned that Spike, a vampire and sometimes-companion, had fallen in love with her. She was disgusted at first, and rejected him completely despite his continued efforts. She grew to trust him when he withstood intense torture at the hands of one of her nemeses in order to protect her younger sister, Dawn. Spike became a loyal member of the Scoobies after her sacrifice, and attempted to comfort her following her resurrection. Buffy, feeling purposeless, then embarked on a highly destructive sexual relationship with him. Spike, who was desperate to have Buffy even when he knew she was only using him to "feel alive," dragged her into the darkness because he thought that was what she desired. After a visit from her ex-boyfriend Riley, who had married another woman, Buffy regained much of her self-confidence, and decided to end her relationship with Spike.[9] Spike grew frustrated with Buffy and his anger, greatly enhanced by his lack of a soul, prompted him to attempt to rape her. Although he realized the horror of his actions after Buffy forced him off of her, she still dared him to ask her why she could never love him. Tortured by his inability to be either a man or a monster, Spike immediately left Sunnydale in order to regain his soul and human conscience. Upon his return, Buffy realized the weight of what he had done for her, and forgave him for what he had done. She welcomed him back into her circle of friends, and defended him to her other companions to show her support and belief in him when he was forced to kill by The First Evil. They eventually reached an extremely strong connection with each other, especially after Spike confessed his feelings for her once more, stating that he not only loved her, but believed in her completely, and that he knew she was "the one." To save Buffy and the world, Spike sacrificed his life during the battle against the First in the Hellmouth, despite Buffy's insistence that he leave with them. In acceptance of Spike's resolution, Buffy clasped hands with him. Their connected hands burst into flame in one of the shows most iconic romantic images. Before Spike died, Buffy finally told Spike that she loved him. This was the first time she had used the words "I love you" in a romantic sense to anyone since Angel. Spike, however, replied that she didn't love him, but that he was grateful that she had said it.[2] Spike then made Buffy leave, and his body crumbled into dust.
Left: Buffy and Spike, and right: Buffy and Angel.
While Buffy explained to both Angel and Spike on separate occasions that she might have a future with either of them someday, she claimed that she was still growing as a person and needed to figure out who she was before worrying about her love life.[2] Similarly, when Angel and a resurrected Spike traveled to Rome to find Buffy, her friend Andrew Wells explained that although Buffy clearly loved both of them, she had to live her life. Angel and Spike had been informed that Buffy was dating the Immortal at the time, though in reality, Andrew had lied to them because he had thought it would be funny to play a joke on them, considering their history with the Immortal.
Following the destruction of her hometown, Buffy traveled around Europe, where she created her army of newly activated Slayers, the Slayer Organization. Due to her combat skills, a Slayer named Satsu became her most trusted fighting companion. When Amy Madison cast a spell on Buffy, she was transported to her dreamspace, a plane where she was told all of her dreams existed. There, she saw an image of a dream about her past lovers Angel and Spike. The dream featured both men naked and holding her, wrapped in chains and surrounded by cupids. Buffy wore a nurses outfit and a Claddagh ring (which artist Georges Jeanty added on his accord, and explained: "Joss had descried the whole scene (in vivid detail) and when I was putting in the little details I put the ring on Buffy. I had it with the heart pointing in because at least in her mind, Buffy was committed to one of them (or both..?)."[10] In order to break the spell she had to be kissed by someone who was in love with her, a task that Satsu completed.[11] Buffy later told Satsu that she was flattered by her feelings, and praised her appearance, abilities, and personality, and remarked it made her feel herself less lonely. Buffy, though, was mostly worried due to her own past relationships, describing that people tended to get hurt.[12] However, the two of them ended up sleeping together anyway.[11] While Satsu remained in love with Buffy, she adopted a stance of either avoiding or protecting her, ordering Satsu to lead Tokyo cell.[13] She accepted the position, and two had sex one last time, before parting ways indefinitely.[13]
Sexuality
Buffy's sexuality is prominently brought into question when she sleeps with fellow Slayer, Satsu.
Buffy is commonly identified as heterosexual, due to the majority of her sexual partners and romantic interests being male, as expressed in her fantasy about Spike and Angel surrounded by phallic imagery.[14] However, her sexual orientation was further explored when she had sex with lesbian Slayer, Satsu. Although the storyline prompted a discussion about her sexuality, Buffy was only faced with negative repercussion with her friends, under the insistence that she wasn't gay, and understanding that her encounter with Satsu was merely experimental.[15][16][17] It's also frequent that fans have read between the lines in regards to Buffy and Faith, and interpret the two to be romantically interested in one another. Buffy herself never mentioned nor described her own orientation, not more than answering to her being gay with "not so you'd notice."[12]
Angel
“What about me? I love you so much, and I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! I hate that it's so hard... and that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did, because you did it to me. Oh, God! I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. I can’t.”
Angel initially loved Buffy from afar, observing her as she was called to fulfill her destiny as the Slayer. He was so inspired by her that he recovered from his state of ensouled depression and moved to Sunnydale to become her ally against evil.
Buffy and Angel met when she was walking in a dark alley. She knocked him to the ground, thinking he was following her. Buffy seemed to have a dislike of him at first while Angel was blunt and mysterious, but were undeniably attracted to one another at the same time. She described him as "dark, gorgeous in an annoying sort of way."[18] Her feelings for him grew, and Angel continued to be drawn to her side. When the two kissed for the first time, Buffy was shocked and disgusted to discover that he was, in fact, a vampire. She sought to destroy him despite her intense desire for him, but discovered that he was unique among his kind for possessing a soul.[19] She realized that Angel had come into her life in order to help her, and was able to look past his vampiric nature for the most part. Although they both sadly agreed that a relationship between them could never work, the two of them were unable to stay away from each other, and officially began dating despite their better judgment. Buffy and Angel became increasing intimate and passionate with each. When the prospect of sex entered their relationship, Buffy was certain that they would inevitably "seize the day" when both of them were ready as their desire for each other was becoming overwhelming to the extent where neither of them were ready to part when Angel was tasked with leaving Sunnydale for a number of months to hide a piece of the Judge's body, a powerful demon that Spike and Drusilla attempted to reawaken by reassembling his constituent body parts. However, it was Angel's love for Buffy that made Spike and Drusilla's plan a success. Angel jumped into a body of water to retrieve Buffy who had been thrown in by a vampire lackey. This allowed Spike's minions to retake the piece that Buffy has recovered from a previous battle and bring the Judge back. Buffy and Angel snuck into Spike's lair to check the current status on the Judge. Sensing their love for each other, the Judge spotted them and Spike attempted to have the Judge kill Buffy by burning out her humanity while Angel watched. The two lovers managed to escape with Buffy weakened after kicking the Judge as his powers could work through contact. Buffy and Angel took to Angel's apartment to recuperate. Angel modestly turned his back to Buffy as she changed out of her wet clothes until he came over to tend to a cut Buffy alleged to have gotten in the struggle. As Angel noticed that the cut was in no way significant, Buffy told him that she was afraid of losing him. Angel admitted that he loved her and cannot pull himself away despite believing he should. Despite Angel's hesitation, the two gave into passion and made love on her 17th birthday,[20] an experience that broke Angelus's curse and triggered the removal of his soul. As Angelus, he attempted to destroy her life and mental stability, and Buffy struggled to destroy him because physically, he was no different from the man she had fallen in love with. When they fought in Angelus's lair, Angel regained his soul, but Buffy was forced to send him to a hell dimension anyway. She was so distraught and heartbroken that she left Sunnydale and her friends for several months,[21] but eventually returned. Though she tried to move on, she continued to have dreams about Angel.
When he unexpectedly returned from hell, Buffy found and took care of him. They tried to maintain a platonic, friendly relationship, but continued to be drawn to each other. Spike, who had recently broken up with Drusilla, was able to pick up on this when he visited Sunnydale. He told them that no matter what, they could never be friends, and that they would continue to love each other until it killed them both. Though in strong denial, Buffy and Angel eventually came to terms with Spike's observation, and attempted to distance themselves to no avail.[22] When Angel tried to kill himself by standing in the sun, Buffy reacted with desperation and confessed to him that she still loved him, and that he should continue fighting the monster within him.[23] The two subsequently attempted their relationship again until Angel chose to break it off, justifying that Buffy deserved a normal life. They attended Buffy's prom together despite having broken up, and Buffy later saved his life by allowing him to drink her blood. After defeating Mayor Wilkins and saving the town, Angel left Sunnydale for good.[24]
Buffy did not take this second heartbreak well, and had in tears, compared her feelings of abandonment to suffocation.[25] Buffy struggled to get over their break-up for several months, her one-night stand with Parker proving to be completely disastrous. Soon after, she wondered if it was better to not open your heart to anyone at all so she could avoid the painful feelings of abandonment and suffering, referring to both Parker and Angel himself.[26] Soon after, Angel had secretly traveled back to Sunnydale to protect Buffy under Doyle's ominous vision of her being in danger. Buffy did not know of this until after he had left and had immediately followed Angel back to Los Angeles, furious and hurt that he had hidden his presence from her the entire time.[27]
Buffy expressed her anger and hurt towards Angel once she arrived, believing him to be tormenting her. Angel protested and argued that he had never wanted to hurt her, he just wanted to keep her safe. Buffy pointedly reminded him that she not helpless. However, she could see she needed the help against the Shumash Indians so she knew Angel wasn't wrong despite the pain it caused. Buffy declared that they should both stop seeing each other and try to forget what was between them. Her declaration was cut short when a Mohra Demon attacked them in the office, barely managing to escape. Buffy decided that she'd help Angel track it so they would be even. Buffy and Angel enter another painful discussion about their relationship, struggling to cope with their hopeless feelings for each other and how being around them only made it worse. They nearly kiss each other only for Buffy to stop it, as it just refreshed more pain by the time they left each other again. Angel was turned human afterwards by the Mohra demon's blood and had passionately kissed Buffy in the sunlight. The two then have a discussion over what to do and how to redefine their relationship. Angel remained the logical one and came up with many reasons to not rush into things as it could easily backfire. Buffy was disappointed and hurt by it, but nevertheless agreed.
However, the plan to take it slow was quickly tossed aside as the two give in to the intense sexual tension between them and lunge at each other in the kitchen. They spend most of the day eating sweets and making love to each other, deeply enjoying the pleasures of being human together. Buffy would reflect in bed with Angel her happiness, realizing that it was the first time she had ever been able "fall asleep in the arms of a normal boyfriend." Buffy's hopes are torn away from her when Angel made a deal with The Oracles to change back to the way he was after being a complete liability to her in the fight against the stronger Mohra Demon. Angel told her he loved her, but they could not be together if she was continually risking her life to protect him and got herself killed doing so. Forces of darkness were also coming so they needed him as who he was. Buffy became defensive and angry, desperately trying to reason to him he was wrong and they could still be happy with each other. However, Angel was firm. Reality setting in, Buffy was devastated, lamenting in tears how she could go on with her life after what they had done together. She desperately kissed Angel and reiterated she would never forget. The day was turned back and Buffy's memory of the experience with Angel was erased entirely, believing she had been in L.A for only five minutes. Only Angel remembered and was forced the carry the burden of what they could've had.[28]
Buffy had eventually entered a serious relationship with military commando Riley Finn. When Riley carried prejudice over Willow dating a werewolf and making it clear that he saw all monsters as dangerous and "evil," Buffy was angry and called him a bigot. Given her love for Angel, Buffy felt insulted by this opinion and argued that love was not logic. Unbeknownst to Riley (who had at that point no idea Buffy had dated a vampire), she had been defending Angel and her relationship with him, making a point of saying that monsters weren't always evil, specifically vampires.[29]
After being informed by Giles that Faith was in Los Angeles and intending to kill Angel, Buffy had quickly left Sunnydale and traveled to L.A to help him, though in reality, she intended to get revenge on Faith for forcibly swapping bodies with her and sleeping with Riley during that time. However, she was shocked and confused to see that Angel was not actually being targeted by Faith anymore, instead he was helping her deal with her guilt of her crimes. Having long-established insecurities over Faith, Buffy was jealous and could not believe he would want to redeem her after everything she had done to both of them. Determined to put her in jail and get revenge, she proceed to furiously lash out at a guilt-stricken Faith. Angel, however, intervened and would not allow her to harm Faith or make her give up hope on herself. Her jealousy and anger having culminated at that point, Buffy proceeded to punch Angel. Completely on reflex, he had punched her back just as hard, shocking her. Buffy argued fiercely with him, refusing to believe that Faith could be trusted or changed. After she had turned herself in willingly, Buffy told Angel she had been worried over him when she realized Faith was after him, not convincing Angel in the least. Bitter and with the intent to hurt him, Buffy coldly informed Angel that she had a new boyfriend that she loved, and one she could actually trust. Successfully hurting him, Angel was truly furious this time and launched a tirade against Buffy, reminding her that, while it was great she had moved on, he himself could not and had no one to share his pain, before telling Buffy that she didn't know him anymore and that she had no right to just show up with her "great new life" and tell him how to do things before harshly demanding that she go back to Sunnydale immediately. Buffy was clearly pained by his harsh tone, seeing it as Angel choosing Faith over her. Buffy hesitantly left Los Angeles and returned home.[30]
Returning to Sunnydale, she was still deeply hurt by Angel's anger to her and refused to tell Riley about it when he had concernedly probed her of it. After Angel visited her in her dorm, Buffy was still angry with what he had said to her and quickly expressed it to him. However, complications arose when Riley arrived and insisted he get away from her. Buffy was annoyed and angry over this when told of his fight with him, believing that Angel's intent had been to harm her boyfriend out of jealousy. After breaking up yet another fight between Riley and Angel, Buffy allowed Angel to explain himself. When he told her what had happened with Riley and sincerely apologized, Buffy forgave him and was grateful he had come. She also admitted that he was right before in saying they weren't part of each other's lives anymore, and she was sorry for her judgmental behavior. Given his tense relationship with Riley, Buffy declined his offer to help her against Adam and asked him to leave Sunnydale, but was nonetheless grateful and amused by Angel's jealousy of Riley.[31] As her relationship with Riley was self-destructing, it was noted by Xander that Angel had caused Buffy to close herself off since their painful break-up and that she had subconsciously saw Riley as the "convenient rebound guy."[8]
After her mother's sudden death, Angel reappeared in Sunnydale to comfort her and try to ease some of her grief. Buffy confessed to him her feeling of purposelessness and how she doubted her ability to get through it, noting how everyone expected her to be "so strong." Angel remained supportive, telling she would get through it and that she was strong. Buffy would impulsively ask if he could stay with her forever, but quickly shook it off and implied her worry of sleeping with him again in her vulnerable state. The two ended up sharing a passionate kiss in the moment, spurning Buffy's worries of her neediness enough that she believed he should go. He apologized for this, but she expressed her immense gratitude for his presence and how it gave her some energy to get through the night. They sat in the cemetery for a few more minutes until sunrise before Angel went back to Los Angeles.[32]
Following Buffy's resurrection, Angel and Buffy met again.[33] While very little is known about their encounter, Buffy later described it as "intense."[34]
Later, while recounting the painful experience of having to kill Angel, Buffy remarked that she would have given anything to be with him and that she "loved him more than she would ever love anything in this life."[35] In her attempt trying to kill a empowered Caleb, Angel suddenly arrived and saved her from being killed when he briefly overpowered her. After the first fight was done, Buffy was truly overjoyed to see him again and, without hesitation, passionately kissed him in welcome.[36]
After exchanging some light-hearted, flirty banter with each other, when realizing Angel intended to stay to fight with her against The First, Buffy discouraged it much to his annoyance and disappointment. She reasoned to him that she needed a second front in case she failed to fight against The First. After having a brief argument with him over it, he acutely pegged her other reason for wanting him to leave, one that involved Spike. When Buffy made no passionate effort to deny it, Angel immediately displayed jealousy and confusion over her connection with him, persistently probing her of it. She was greatly irritated of his possessive and childish behavior, increasing more at his dislike of Spike receiving a soul as well. When Angel expressed an interest in re-starting their relationship at some point, Buffy explained she didn't think she was ready for a serious relationship and that she still had a lot of growing up to do, awkwardly comparing herself to cookie dough that was still "baking." Leaving the amulet that would help her with the First, Angel prepared to leave Sunnydale. Still loving him, Buffy called him back at the last second and admitted to him that she did still desire a future together with Angel, but made it clear it would be a "long time coming, years if ever." Satisfied with this response and hope in being with her restored, he departed. Buffy watched after him somewhat sadly until he was gone.[2]
After Angel took up the Los Angeles branch of Wolfram & Hart, it's stated by Andrew Wells that the Scoobies lost trust and that even Buffy was affected by this, refusing to leave to the psychotic slayer Dana in his care and ordered Andrew to take her to the Slayer Organization "under any means necessary" by bringing up a large group of Slayers.[37] However, she was eventually informed of the truth behind Angel and Spike's infiltration of Wolfram & Hart so this could've softened her distrust.[38]
While they continued to be apart, Buffy maintained her feelings for Angel. At some point during her position as general of the Slayer Organization, she would have a sexual dream of Angel (and Spike) holding her naked while she was wearing a nurse outfit ,[14] and dreamed of him again when she was thrown back in 1997. She had consciously chosen to wear the first cross Angel had given her long ago, and then quickly denied it meaning anything when he had taken notice of it. Despite being somewhat standoffish with him on the outside, Buffy commented on his attractiveness in her thoughts and asked him if he would change the future if he could (possibly referring to Angel's turn to Angelus after she had slept with him the first time) which he had disagreed with.[39]
Buffy and Angel didn't meet again until over a year later, when Angel suddenly reappeared in her life as a masked villain with the intention of empowering her by murdering her fellow Slayers. Angel had been manipulated by both Whistler and a mysterious entity called Twilight, who had convinced Angel that he needed to enforce its plan in order to save the world and ensure that Buffy survive. After discovering Twilight's true identity, Buffy was brought to the brink of despair, but became a superpowered Deity-like creature as a result of Angel's influence. Upon discovering that Angel had not transformed into Angelus again, she immediately tried to stake him, furious and disgusted with him for torturing her and the other Slayers for the better part of a year (he was responsible for the deaths of over 200 of Buffy's Slayers). Angel, however, could not be killed as a result of the powers granted to him by Twilight. Buffy started to calm down slightly after hitting him a few more times when Angel explained he did what he did to focus her and lower the death rate in her war against humanity. After a while, she began to feel the effects of Twilight's influence on her, which caused her to act upon her feelings of lust and love for Angel. The two of them had passionate airborne sex that led to the birth of a new universe, Twilight, which they later came to discover threatened Earth's existing universe. Angel tried desperately to convince her to stay with him in the Twilight paradise, but Buffy refused him, believing that Twilight was only a trap. Angel told her that it was what she was meant for all along; while Buffy briefly considered Angel's offer, upon hearing Xander's scream of pain, rejected it fully, and justified that she was meant to fight for her family and friends, not personal happiness. Angel eventually agreed to leave the paradise, choosing to fight by Buffy's side instead.[40]
When Spike reappeared in his ship with a plan to save the world, Angel was visibly jealous, but Buffy told him that jealousy was beneath him, and confessed that she still loved him and wanted to be with him. However, she appeared to be uncharacteristically happy, considering their sexual encounter had caused an apocalypse, which implied that Twilight's glow was still affecting her to some unknown level. She also told Angel that she didn't trust him, but that he was had her heart. Buffy managed to convince Angel to undo the damage he had done as Twilight, and reassured him that she was only going to Spike for information and help. She then left with Spike. Later, Angel was possessed by Twilight again, and attempted to kill Spike in rage and fought to protect the Seed of Wonder in the ruins of Sunnydale. The battle reached its climax with Angel brutally murdering Buffy's Watcher, Rupert Giles, before her very eyes. In despair, she completed her duty and smashed the Seed, destroying Twilight's influence for good.[41] Despite the greater amount of strain and complications between her and Angel, Buffy did not want him staked. She recovered herself enough to quickly jump between an enraged Xander and helpless Angel, preventing her friend from killing him with her scythe. Buffy tearfully reasoned to Xander, saying despairingly "Please. I can't lose anybody else. I can't lose you, Xander."[42]
Angel's guilt left him catatonic. Buffy, unable to look at him without feeling disturbed and unhappy but still believing he should be taken care of, left him in the care of Faith in London.[43] Later, when contacting several people for help in saving a dying Dawn, Buffy decided not to even bother trying to call Angel given their complicated relationship at the time.[42]
When Giles returned to the Scooby Gang, Buffy realized that Angel helped resurrect him. While she was glad Giles was alive, she didn't particularly comment on Angel's involvement or her current feelings on him.[44][45] The two were reunited when Angel came to help in the first major confrontation with Archaeus, but by that point Buffy had begun dating Spike again. Buffy and Angel parted as friends, but Angel expressed doubt that her relationship with Spike would last simply because of Spike's nature not allowing him to be content in relationships as he felt he didn't deserve them.
Spike
“Be easier, wouldn't it? If it were an act? But it's not. You faced the monster inside of you and you fought back. You risked everything to be a better man. And you can be. You are. You may not see it… but I do. I do. I believe in you, Spike.”
As opposed to Buffy and Angel, Buffy and Spike were originally brutal enemies. They became reluctant allies when Angelus and Drusilla threatened to suck the world into hell, but remained adversaries until Spike was implanted with a chip that prevented him from hurting humans. Spike's affection for her began as completely one-sided (he began trying to help and comfort her in any way he could, but his absence of a soul made his love come off as twisted and obsessive). Initially, Buffy remained either oblivious or in denial of his newfound feelings, constantly expressing hostility towards him and repeatedly injured him. After nearly dying by vampire with her own stake, Buffy sought out Spike to improve herself since he had killed two slayers himself. Meeting at The Bronze, she was impatient and repeatedly insisted to him to tell her how he killed them. Spike told Buffy his life story and eventually reached the fate of the two slayers he had killed, shaking Buffy when he told her they only died because some part of them had wanted to, to end the constant life-or-death of a slayer; even Buffy herself. Rattled, Buffy was angered to see Spike attempt to kiss her and forced him to the ground, saying that even if she did want to die, it would never be by his hand since he was "beneath her." However, she would allow Spike to sit next to her when he found her crying over her mother's health on the porch. She was confused, but was far too miserable and overwhelmed to question his behavior.[46] Buffy's antagonism softened somewhat to a point, requesting he keep her mother and Dawn safe at his crypt since Glory was close and he was the strongest person around who could protect them, but warned him if they died, she would kill him in a instant; Spike was surprised, but agreed.[47] After Dawn realized she was The Key, Buffy was furious towards Spike (who had went along with Dawn) and immediately inflicted injury on him. The two argued over Dawn, but Buffy's hostility disappeared when Spike told her she should've just been honest with her from the start and things wouldn't of been as bad if she did.[48] Buffy was very disgusted when she discovered his love for her, even labeling it as "creepy," but Spike was not prepared to give up without a fight, and kidnapped her and threatened with death by his ex-lover Drusilla's hands if she didn't admit she had at least some form of feelings for him. Buffy remained cold, harshly telling him the only chance he would ever have with her was when she was knocked out. After she escaped, she severed all bonds between them, and alienated him from the Scoobies.[49] She was, however, very moved when he withstood intense torture to protect both her and her sister, and rewarded him with a kiss. Her intense hatred of him lessened into mild dislike, not hesitating to point out her revulsion of him creating a Buffybot to sleep with but gratefully promised him she would never forget what he did for her and Dawn.[50] Buffy accepted Spike back into the fold and assigned him as the protector of Dawn despite Xander and Giles' protests since he was the only one beside her strong enough to do so.[51] Before their battle with Glorificus, Buffy began to trust and respect Spike, re-inviting him back into her house and fighting side-by-side with him. Spike declared that he knew she would never love him, but she treated him like a man and that was enough for him. She visibly acknowledged this, but did not comment.[52]
After Buffy was resurrected, Spike expressed worry for her wounded hands, and consoled her for having to dig her way out of her own grave by admitting that he once had to do the same thing. Spike was also the first person Buffy told about her being cast out of Heaven instead of Hell, and how truly depressed she felt.[53] Feeling depressed and disconnected from life, Buffy began to confide more and more in Spike. When the demon Sweet cursed the inhabitants of Sunnydale to reveal their true feelings through songs, Buffy revealed to her friends that she had been ripped from heaven, and attempted to commit suicide. Spike, however, saved her at the last minute, and told her that she had to go on living. In the alley outside The Bronze, the two shared their kissed with passion,[54] though Buffy later regretted it. After Giles left for England, she once more kissed Spike, but rationalized to him that she was vulnerable because of her feelings of abandonment.[55]
Their relationship changed when Spike realized he could hurt the newly-resurrected Buffy despite his chip. Frustrated with her continued rejection and treatment of him, he provoked her to fight him in an abandoned, dilapidated building. In the midst of their dual, Buffy suddenly kissed him again, but did not stop as she had before. The two of them had sex for the first time, and the house collapsed around them, foreshadowing the initial destructive nature of their relationship.[56] The next morning, Buffy was disgusted with herself, and coldly told Spike that he had simply been convenient and that their encounter had been a mistake.[57] Despite Buffy's desire to stop herself, she began an addictive and mutually abusive sexual relationship with Spike that made both of them unhappy. Buffy was stricken with confusion and self-disgust over this as it prolonged. At this point, she developed genuine feelings of care and affection for him despite his status as a soulless vampire. She had begun to believe that his love for her was in fact real and this burdened her with all-encompassing guilt and sympathy for Spike, knowing full-well that she was using him because she did not return his love.[58]
After a visit from her ex-boyfriend Riley, Buffy broke off their relationship, and told him that she couldn't love him and was only using him to "feel alive."[9] Buffy admitted that while she did have feelings for Spike, she did not love him, and told him that their relationship couldn't have been real to him because despite all the good he had done, he was still empty inside. Buffy's continued rejection of his advances caused Spike to have drunken sex with Anya Jenkins. Buffy was visibly hurt by their encounter, leading to her friends and sister finally learning about her relationship with Spike. Dawn Summers expressed to Spike that he had hurt her sister, and urged him to talk to her. When he met her, he tried once more to convince Buffy that she did love him and simply didn't want to admit it. Buffy subsequently told Spike that he was right in thinking that she had feelings for him, but matter-of-factly insisted she didn't love him like he wanted to believe. She enforced her point by saying she could never trust him enough to feel that way. In a misguided attempt to connect to Buffy through sex and to make her admit his belief that she loved him, Spike tried to rape her. Though she was able to fight him off in her weakened condition, in tears, she dared him to ask her once again why she could never love him. Shocked and disgusted with himself, Spike fled Sunnydale for Africa, where he fought to regain his soul, for without it, he could be neither a man nor a monster.[59]
Several months passed before Buffy reunited with Spike, whom she found living off rats in the basement of Sunnydale High.[60] Despite her conflicted feelings for him, she was moved to tears when he revealed that he had regained his soul to prove his worth to her.[61] She agreed to forgive him for his past actions, and welcomed him back into her circle of close friends. Spike's love and and devotion were only heightened by his new soul, and he and Buffy quickly developed a strong, meaningful connection with each other. While Spike dealt with the inner demons associated with being ensouled, Buffy offered support and told him repeatedly that she believed him and trusted him. Their unresolved feelings for one another eventually became clear to Buffy's friends, and were a source of growing concern for Giles in particular, who worried that Buffy's feelings were affecting her better judgment.
Buffy and Spike's relationship changes from hatred to love and esteem.
When Spike's chip started to malfunction, convinced that he could be a good man and wouldn't be a danger to her friends, Buffy contacted Riley in order to have it removed. After the Scoobies and the Potentials rejected her leadership and kicked her out of her own house, Spike followed her to an abandoned house and comforted her. He expressed to a dejected Buffy that he not only loved her, but believed in her completely. Buffy asked him to hold her, and the two spent a night together, Spike just holding Buffy.[62] The following day, Spike admitted to Buffy that he had never felt closer to anyone in his life than he did while watching her sleep. Though Spike at first worried that Buffy would poke fun at him for his mindless devotion, she surprised him by saying that their encounter had been important to her as well, and that she had been right there with him through it all. They could not, however, define their relationship. When Spike asked what it meant, Buffy replied questionably "I don't know? Does it have to mean something?" He told her that it didn't, but when she tried to continue the conversation by insinuating that she might be able to give him a real chance with her, Spike cut her off before she could finish and replied "Let's just be heroes."[63]
When Angel returned and Buffy greeted him with a kiss, Spike witnessed their interaction and reacted out of jealousy and anger. Meanwhile, Buffy defended Spike against Angel and insisted he could do good and was a different man from before, showing great trust in him. She said that she was not in a relationship with Spike, but he still had a place close to her heart nonetheless. However, she did say she did not see "fat grandchildren," implying she did not truly see a successful future between them but with Spike, he was helping making some sense of things around her. When she went back to her house and realized his anger over Angel, Buffy became irritated, as she had grown visibly sick of Angel and Spike's jealousy over her because of the love they both shared for her. She claimed to Spike that her kiss with Angel had been a "hello." Spike was disbelieving of this, but quickly overcame it when Buffy presented him with the amulet Angel had left her with. She told him that it was only meant to be worn by a Champion of the people before giving it to him. Spike was moved by her belief in him. They spent the final two nights before the battle together; there is ambiguity about whether they spent the final night just laying together, like the previous nights, or if they eventually had sex. Creator Joss Whedon revealed that he wanted to preserve the mystery.
The following day, Buffy and Spike, along with her friends and fellow Slayers, battled the First Evil in the Hellmouth. The amulet activated during the fight, and emitted a powerful blast of sunlight that destroyed the entire Turok-Han army. Though Buffy tried to get Spike to return to the surface with her, he told her that he had to give up his life, and in acceptance, her eyes became teary and clasped hands with him, smiling at him proudly for proving his merit as a champion. Their hands burst into flame as the Hellmouth collapsed around them in one of the series' most memorable and iconic romantic images. Buffy finally told Spike that she loved him (the first time she used the words "I love you" romantically to anyone since Angel), but Spike replied: "No you don't, but thanks for saying it," and forced her to leave him behind.[2] Upon his resurrection in Los Angeles, Spike chose not to contact her because thought that seeing her too soon after his heroic death would have proven anti-climactic.[64]
It was never revealed when and how Buffy found out Spike was alive. The two were finally reunited after Buffy had Twilight-induced sex with Angel and endangered the entire world. She was gruff with Spike, who had just saved her life, and did not hug him, but did thank him for his "studly" sacrifice. Later in his room, she appeared much more comfortable and friendly with him. As he revealed his plan to save the world, she fantasized sexually about him. In the fantasy, she reminded him that he was the person she confided in when she couldn't talk to anyone else (her "dark place.") Spike, however, wrongly assumed that she was fantasizing about Angel; she was too embarrassed to correct him, and brushed her fantasy off as an after effect of the Twilight glow. Later, the two fought the Master and Twilight together, and were able to overcome both, although Buffy's Watcher, Giles, was killed by a Twilight-possessed Angel in the battle to destroy the Seed of Wonder.
Following the destruction of the Seed, Spike and Buffy both moved to San Francisco, where they kept in regular contact with one another. Spike was one of the few people who remained supportive of Buffy, which caused her to burst into tears and run away.[43] Buffy tried to flirt with him at a party at her new apartment, but Spike ignored her advances because she was visibly drunk. When questioned by the demon Eldre Koh, Spike revealed that Buffy needed someone "normal," rather than a vampire like him.
When Buffy believed herself pregnant after a night she didn't remember, she briefly considered asking Spike to run away with her so they could raise the baby together. She decided, however, that she couldn't be a faithful mother to a child at that time, and instead asked Spike to accompany her to the abortion clinic. Spike comforted her and agreed. While on the way to the clinic, Buffy discussed this with him and insensitively pointed out to Spike that she believed they didn't have a future together and it would never work out as well as saying she "goes to him to flout every muscle in her slayer body." Spike was angered and hurt by her remarks afterwards, believing that he was just someone she went to when she had no one else to turn to. This immediately caused Buffy to feel bad and regret saying her blunt words as he left the room. During a battle with zompires, detective Dowling told Buffy that he knew Spike was still in love with her. Surprised, Buffy questioned Spike, who admitted his feelings for her once again, and told her that he could try his best to give her the "normal life" she wanted. The moment was interrupted when a zompire tore off Buffy's arm, revealing her to be a robot. Buffy then dealt with the shocking knowledge that her mind had been transferred into a robotic body by Andrew during the party, and that her supposed pregnancy had only been a malfunction of the robot. She thanked Spike for being there for her when she needed him.[65]
Once the crisis was resolved, Spike came to the decision to leave Buffy in order to "discover himself." Spike explained to her that although he loved her, he was never truly sure where her heart was in regards to him, and that he had grown tired of being jerked around. He made sure she understood that he didn't blame her, but that he needed to spend time away from her. Before leaving, Spike earnestly expressed that he had faith in her and would always have her back. Despite her disappointment and sadness, she did not try to stop him, and allowed him to leave on his bug ship.[66]
Since the restoration of magic, Spike has returned to Buffy and spent months working together with the Scooby Gang. The two often commented on the mature aspect of their friendship, but their close friends noticed the forceful nature of these statements. While Buffy often remarked their unhappy past together and fear of repeating history,[44][45][67] Spike confessed his lasting interest on the Slayer to his close friends Dowling and Xander, after insistence from both.[68] When confronted with her feelings in a conversation with Dawn, Buffy preferred leaving to help Spike fighting in a cemetery, where she suddenly kissed him.[69] Seeing his confusion, Buffy explained they both were currently in differently places and had grown since their last attempt, and realized she "never really gave us a shot." Since he had recently accepted his position with her, Spike became even more confused, asking her if she wasn't simply trying to be with him because it was another unattainable relationship. His accusations made angered her, and she left. After a conversation with Xander, who supported them together, Spike sough Buffy to apologize, but she then agreed with him, saying Spike and his friendship were too important to complicate again, and thanked him for doing the right thing. Spike, though, pointed one problem: he was in love with her. They had sex that night and since then have resumed their relationship.[70]
During a visit of Angel, Buffy revealed her renewed relationship with Spike, and he was visibly bothered. Finally accepting them together, he stated that he would not interfere with them, but told Willow in secrecy that he doubted that it'd last, recognizing over the years that Spike sough relationships that he believed would save him from himself, only to push his partners away and convince himself his problems were simply unfixable.[71] This interpretation was once again stated by Harmony, when, trying to destabilize to couple, she told Spike he worshiped Buffy and "built her up as some impossible ideal of womanhood and virtue and love. Something no real person could ever be," and that he was starting to understand he just loved a fantasy, would do things to push her away, hurting her to make her end it, so he could play "the martyr, the heartbroken romantic, rejected by the woman he loved," comparable to his history with Drusilla and Cecily. In parallel, Vicki accused Buffy of being "into the tortured bad boy," who wanted what she didn't have and get bored with what she can, pretending to be shocked when Spike starts acting like what he is, saying he turned evil, stabbing him, and sending him to hell, in clear comparison with Angel.[72]
When Buffy was faced with a critical crisis to save the world, she took her anger and frustration on her friends, in special on his boyfriend Spike. Saddened he wanted to help but only making her angry, Spike suggested them to break up. He pointed his inability to give her a normal life despite his want, and it'd be easier for the to call things off before it hurts worse later. Buffy immediately stopped crying and disagreed with him, and asked him to follow her in her mission and hit the road. With the time, Buffy agreed it would be easier to break up indeed, but it wasn't right; she could've had a normal relationship with Riley, but it didn't erase other challenges, as nothing would ever be perfect. Buffy declared that they together was something she didn't want to lose without a fight, and she wanted to give it a try. Spike recognized he did make her a symbol of everything he needed: salvation, redemption, love, a reason to go on and be better; that he was selfish and needed it at the time. But he didn't anymore, so he wanted to give it a try too, this time with the actual her.[73]
Spike confided with Dowling, about his relationship with Buffy, that "things are ace now. Equal, like. About how we make each other better, not some selfish neuroses our mom and dad hammered into us."[74] After once again saving the world, Buffy was finally able to tell Spike she loved him.[75]
Other Romances
“Because— Okay, I'm cookie dough. I'm not done baking yet. I'm not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I'm gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready. I'm cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat— or enjoy warm, delicious cookie me, then… that's fine. That'll be then. When I'm done.”
―Buffy and her stance on her personal life using a cookie baking analogy[src]
While Buffy's primary relationships were with Angel and Spike, she has had many other romantic encounters through her life, though all have been relatively short-lived. Other love interests included Pike and Riley Finn, an antithesis to Angel and Spike who was her third longest running relationship.
Billy Fordham — Buffy developed a crush on Ford in the fifth grade, but he was a "manly sixth-grader" who had no time for younger girls. They became friends at Hemery High, where Ford secretly discovered that Buffy was the Slayer. In 1998, he showed up in Sunnydale and told Buffy that his father had been transferred and that he would be attending the local high school. In fact, Ford had months to live and was there only to find a vampire leader to arrange a deal: the blood of Buffy and his followers in exchange for eternal life. Buffy was devastated by Ford's betrayal, though moved by his cancer. When he rose as a vampire, she staked him without reaction; the Ford she knew and loved had already died.[76]
Tyler — In her freshman year of high school, Buffy gossiped about a boy named Tyler with her friends, immediately before she was called as the Slayer. She said of him, "Oh my God! Where were you when I got over Tyler? He's of the past. Tyler would have to crawl on his hands and knees to get me to go to the dance with him. Which, actually, he's supposed to do after practice, so I'm gonna wait."[77][3]
Jeffrey Kramer — Buffy's vain and popular boyfriend during her freshman year at Hemery High, Buffy and Jeffrey grew distant as she took on the responsibility as the Slayer and he finally broke up with her by leaving a message on her answering machine. He went to the dance with Buffy's vapid friend, Jennifer Walkens, but while the pair were having sex, they were interrupted by a vampire attack. Buffy slayed the demons while Jeffrey fled in only his underwear.[3]
Oliver Pike — Pike was Buffy's main romantic interest before arriving in Sunnydale. Classmates at Hemery High, they initially hated each other as Buffy's superficial valley girl perspective was at odds with Pike's working class ethics. However, after both losing friends to Lothos, the two grew closer and Pike aided Buffy in killing the vampire king and burning down the school gym full of his minions. Following Buffy's expulsion from Hemery, she and Pike spent time together in Las Vegas, but eventually broke up as Buffy moved to Sunnydale without him. Buffy later told Willow and Xander that she no longer kept in touch with Pike.[3]
Owen Thurman — A sensitive and shy Sunnydale High student who crossed paths with Buffy at the library where she was there on duty while Owen wanted to borrow an Emily Dickinson book. Buffy became attracted to him and even claimed to be Dickinson fan herself to get his interest, despite only just learning of her existence. The set a date at the Bronze, which she arrived late she was forced into patrol and was disappointed to find Cordelia had made a move on him. Arranging a second date, Owen lent Buffy his watch so she would get the time right. She put off her duties until the time was at its most dire and Owen tagged only, his interest in the morbid making like the idea of breaking into a morgue. In the event, he was almost killed by a maniacal vampire, making Buffy brutally kill it. This vampire-hunting adventure made Owen feel alive. Fearing that such an attitude would get him killed, Buffy broke up with Owen the next day, unable to tell him the real reason why; nor to say that she still cared for him just as much.[78]
Tom Warner — A rich member of Delta Zeta Kappa fraternity, a cult that sacrifices beautiful young high school girls to their demon lord Machida in exchange for worldly success. Tom lured Buffy to a party, pretending to be nicer and less materialistic than his vain fraternity brothers. The leader of the cult, Tom attempted to offer Buffy and Cordelia as sacrifices. The only good thing Tom did is prevent Buffy from being date raped by frat brother Richard Anderson after she fell unconscious after being drugged, though this was for the purpose of keeping her as a pure sacrifice.[79]
Cameron Walker — A self-absorbed and arrogant swimming athlete at Sunnydale High. Initially, Buffy was interested in the good-looking Cameron, who waxed poetry about the ocean. However, by the end of their first date, he made advances on her and wouldn't take no for an answer, so Buffy broke his nose and got blamed for "leading him on" as he put it.[80]
Gage Petronzi — Like Carmon Walker, Gage was a member of the Sunnydale High Swim Team. Believing Gage maybe the next victim of the monster that seemingly killed Cameron, Buffy started following Gage to keep and eye on him. Gage noticed this and Buffy claimed she was doing it because she was attracted to members of the swim team. Gage then annoyingly blew her off before being attacked by Angelus. After Buffy saved him, Gage became very grateful and insisted that she walk him home. He also waved at her the next day while she watched him practice. However, this attraction would not be followed by as he was then transformed into a monster.[80]
Scott Hope — A fellow Sunnydale High student who had a crush on Buffy. Scott asked Buffy out several times. Although Buffy was interested in Scott, she was still overwhelmed by her heartbreak over Angel and repeatedly turned him down. Eventually, Buffy decided to date Scott,[81] but Angel's return from hell distracts her. Buffy and Scott were only together a few weeks; Scott broke up with her because he was tired with dealing with her ongoing preoccupations. He did however agree to give his vote at the time of the Homecoming Dance which she ran for queen. Years later, Buffy learned that Scott had told classmates that they had broken up because she was a lesbian, and had ironically come out as gay himself in college.[82]
Eddie — Eddie was a fellow freshman at UC Sunnydale. He, like Buffy, was overwhelmed by his college experience and couldn't find his dorm room. Buffy helped him and the two departed, believing they'll see each other again in Psych 101. Even though a mutual attraction was hinted by the two, nothing ever comes of it when Eddie was sired by vampireSunday, forcing Buffy to stake him.[83]
Parker Abrams — An attractive, older student whom Buffy met in college at the cafeteria. Posing as a friendly, sensitive guy which she could move on from Angel with, she slept with him only weeks after meeting him, desperate for a relationship. Parker was the second person Buffy had sex with. However, he was only interested in having "a good time" and, not wanting a romantic commitment, ignored Buffy after they slept together.[6] Buffy was devastated by his behavior, but maintained a brief hope that they could reconcile. While under the influence of enchanted beer, Buffy saved Parker's life when he was trapped in a burning building. In the aftermath of the rescue, Parker apologized to Buffy for his actions, and she responded by bashing him on the head with a wooden club.[84]
Riley Finn — Riley was Buffy's main love interest at UC Sunnydale. Buffy met Riley when she started at college. At first, she didn't show much interest in him (instead focusing on Parker Abrams) while Riley himself saw her as strange.[83] She began to warm up to him after he gave her a pep talk to encourage her to go out on Halloween night, much to her gratitude as she was still suffering from depression over her one-night stand with Parker.[26] When Riley approached her at a party on her day off, she briefly was uncomfortable and disinterested at his awkward attempt to start a conversation with her. On a mission to capture Hostile 17 for the Initiative, Buffy was shocked to see Riley when she was trying to kill Spike. She tried hard to get him away from her for his protection when Spike was around, coming off as rude and desperate. After it was over and she failed to find him, Buffy later apologized for her odd behavior, teasingly calling him "peculiar" after another random outburst of his.[85] Buffy continued to spent time with him and even asked him if he would like to be a their own Thanksgiving, only for Riley explain he was traveling back to Iowa to be with his family.[27] In a conversation with Willow, Buffy admitted that she liked being around Riley and knew he cared about her. However, she felt like something was missing with him. Much to Buffy's despair, she expressed a preference for intense and passion-filled relationships as opposed to the "safe, reliable ones." Under the effects of Willow's backfired spell, Buffy had cheerfully rejected Riley and insensitively told him about her "relationship" with her fiancee' Spike, thoroughly confusing and alienating him. Once the spell was broken, Buffy was horrified and embarrassed over what she had done. Claiming she was "over" bad boys, she sought out Riley and said she was joking over marrying Spike. Riley accepted this explanation, glad to know she was still single.[1] Buffy had a fantasy about Riley during class and he had tried to kiss her afterwards, only for a nervous Buffy to interrupt his advances. She would reflect on this to Willow, expressing her guilt they she had to keep her role as The Slayer secret from him. Brought together through the loss of their voices because of the Gentlemen, the two finally had their first kiss. In the midst of the battle against the Gentlemen, Buffy and Riley accidentally come across each other in the fight, effectively exposing their double lives. Riley visited her in her dorm and the two uncomfortably conclude they had to talk.[86] While he showed awe of her skills and strength when she told Riley who she was, Buffy was distrusting and upset that he had kept secrets from her. Easily pegging his status as a military commando, she was disappointed that Riley was not exactly the "perfect, normal guy" she was looking for. Uncertain and uncomfortable by this new knowledge, Buffy suggested they have some time apart. Nonetheless, he sought her out again while she was patrolling. Frustrated and overwhelmed, Buffy rejected him and told him they could not be together. She explained to him they didn't have a future together because her life was too dangerous for him and that she could not bear another doomed relationship. As Riley continued to persist, the two clashed with their differing views on fighting demons. Buffy coldly said they did not have a lot in common and for him it was just a "fun job" while for her fighting evil was a burden and something she couldn't change. They have another confrontation afterwards. Riley accurately accused her of being too afraid to take another chance with someone because keeping the "doom-and-gloom" mentality and withdrawing from others was "'safer." Stung by this words, Buffy initially brushed him off. However, after once again closing the Hellmouth and saving the world, she reconsidered her opinion on him. Pushing aside her reservations, Buffy kissed Riley to show she was willing to give it a shot.[87] Buffy established Riley as her boyfriend. However, complications began to arise as Riley struggled to absorb all the apocalypses she had stopped and how long she had been slaying. During a sparring match with him, she had accidentally used a little of her Slayer strength and kicked Riley across the room, clearly shocking him. They began to clash as Riley's loyalty between The Initiative conflicted with Buffy's defiance of authority and preference to do things her own way. Riley seemed to overcome her super strength and extreme "take charge" attitude, assuring her that he was attracted to those qualities of her. Buffy was very relieved and touched that he was beginning to accept her.[88] Riley trusted her enough to be a part of The Initiative, but Buffy fit in there poorly, due to her habit of questioning the orders of authority. After going on patrol with him, Buffy slept with Riley for the first time. It was also the first time she had ever woken up with someone right next to her. Buffy was very relieved and happy over this.[89] Following Maggie Walsh's death, Riley and Buffy's relationship suffered another blow. Riley discovered that she was housing Spike in secret and immediately was suspicious and angry, not understanding why she would harbor a monster and not tell him. It worsened when Riley became sick and delirious due to the withdrawal of the drugs Walsh had fed him (disguised as "nutrients") to enhance his strength. While Riley's entire world was falling apart, Buffy tended to him and comforted him in his sick state. Afterwards, Buffy would again lament her disappointment that Riley was not "boring" or "normal" like she had wanted him to be, but she nonetheless decided to try and make things work since she genuinely cared for and had strong feelings for him. When Riley's sickness was taken care of in the Initiative, Buffy wanted to be with him since she felt this was a time he really needed her.[90] A healing Riley soon expressed to Buffy his complete lack of purpose and how he no longer knew if The Initiative was a source of good or evil anymore, Buffy gave him a heartfelt speech, reassuring him that he didn't have to follow them if he didn't want to. When Riley said take away the Initiative from him and he has nothing left, Buffy disagreed and said he still would be a "good man."[91] Upon the realization that Riley had unknowingly slept with Faith during their "body swap," Buffy was very disturbed and hurt, refreshing her grudge against Faith entirely.[92] Buffy and Riley's relationship became strained. Buffy blamed him to some extent for not knowing it wasn't her he had slept with and worried that he wanted someone "experienced" like Faith was. Through the advice of Jonathan, Buffy and Riley shared a dance together and made peace with each other. Buffy's fears of Riley preferring Faith soon ceased.[93] Under the influence of mystical forces, Buffy and Riley had intense and long sessions of sex together in during a party with some of the Initiative members, unknowingly creating chaos throughout the place as they became a "battery" for poltergeist activity. Once the affect had worn off, Buffy and Riley were guilty of what happened, though they nonetheless enjoyed the sex.[94] They also disagreed over the status of demons as he disapproved of Willow's relationship with a werewolf, Oz. Buffy was annoyed with his black-and-white mentality of all monsters being bad and that it was foolish to date a non-human creature because it was too "dangerous." Having fallen in love with a vampire, Buffy vaguely mentioned that not all vampires were "bad," referring to Angel. When Riley sacrificed his career for his relationship with Buffy and his "all monsters were bad" beliefs were lessened, Buffy decided it was the right time to tell him about her previous relationship.[29] During a huge argument with Angel, Buffy had claimed that she loved Riley and trusted him much more than she did him. However, Buffy was very clearly aiming to hurt Angel's feelings, so it's debatable whether Buffy truly believed this or not.[30] Despite Riley's distrust and jealousy of Angel, Buffy had allowed Angel to explain himself and accepted his apology for his treatment of her. Riley had assumed Buffy had slept with Angel during her time in L.A and came to the conclusion she was going back to him. Buffy was hurt and shocked at his lack of trust in her, quickly correcting him. After Riley explained his jealousy was because he was so in love with her, Buffy said "I know the feeling." They hugged and regained their closeness, only for Riley to distance himself from her after hearing the devastating death of Forrest.[31] Riley and Buffy took down Adam,[95] and resumed a stable, normal relationship. When Riley had described as being attracted to immortals like Dracula and Angel, Buffy became slightly offended and insisted that she was still his girlfriend.[96] Buffy became focused on finding herself and discovering her true nature as a slayer, beginning to train with Giles again, causing her relationship with Riley to become second in importance. Buffy soon realized this, and started to worry that she was being unfair to Riley by being so caught up in her slayer side.[97] When told of a demon's plan to split her into her "slayer side" and "Buffy side," Buffy questioned if Riley would have wanted that to happen, seeing how he did not completely understand her duties as a slayer above all else. Riley immediately disagreed with her, stating that he knew being a slayer was part of who she was and that there wasn't any part of Buffy he was not in love with. Buffy was touched by this, but once again did not tell him she loved him back.[7] Riley's health began to deteriorate (an after-affect of the Initiative drugs), and Buffy was increasingly concerned with his abnormally high heart rate. However, Riley brushed it off and was unwilling to sacrifice his enhanced strength that would enable him to keep up with Buffy while simultaneously safe their relationship. When Riley had confessed this to her, Buffy was angered and heartbroken. She gave an emotional speech to him, unable to believe that he found her shallow enough to only date a man with super powers. She claimed that he knew her better than anyone, and she had opened up to him in ways she never did with anyone else. Buffy insisted she needed him, but if he was determined to not trust her, then she would at least have him healthy again. Convinced by the strength of her pain, Riley agreed to have The Initiative fix him. Buffy seemed to utterly believe everything she had told him, but it was nonetheless clear Riley still carried doubts.[98] As her mother's health suffered more and more, Buffy unconsciously distanced herself from Riley, rarely telling him what was going on or how Joyce was feeling; Spike knew she was having a CAT scan before he did. Spike also claimed that Buffy's type in men was dangerous vampires and while she did like Riley, he was not enough to satisfy her. Riley made another effort to connect to Buffy over her grief for Joyce, but she refused since she had resigned to being strong for everyone else.[99] After sleeping with Riley one last time, Buffy was taken to a vampire nest with Spike and was horrified to realize Riley had been allowing vampire prostitutes suck on his blood for the rush. Furious and betrayed, Buffy burned down the nest and worked out her anger in her training room. Riley confronted her and begged her to listen to him, a reluctant and still cold Buffy agreeing. When Riley had informed her of his recklessness and the growing feeling he felt of Buffy not truly needing him because of her unwillingness to be vulnerable with him, Buffy was even more furious. She wrongly assumed Riley was blaming her for it and became defensive, arguing that the slayer had to be that way. Riley would then give her an ultimatum: He'd stay if she gave their relationship another shot or he'd leave with the military and never return. She resisted, refusing to listen to him like the entire thing was her fault. However, Xander gave her a harsh speech afterwards, reminding her of how much Riley loved her and revealing to Buffy she had been subconsciously seeing him the entire time as just convenient. Realizing her treatment of Riley and believing that she might be able to love him the same way someday, she ran to meet him and stop him from leaving. Ultimately, Riley had already departed on the helicopter, leaving a shocked and regretful Buffy behind in Sunnydale.[8] While she did not love Riley, Buffy took her second failed relationship extremely hard. She half-heartedly considered being a nun and explained to Dawn while part of her was angry with him, the other part of her blamed herself for what he went through. She logically reasoned it was better that Riley was needed, but projected her post-break-up depression on Xander and Anya's relationship. She had burst into tears when she recalled how she ignored the "little signs" of her relationship with Riley when Tara had made a comment over an argument the two had and then cried again when she saw Xander and Anya together in happy relationship.[100] Looking back on her failed relationship with Riley, Buffy would state she had never been there for him and wondered if it was partly because of her hardening as the Slayer.[50] He returned to Sunnydale only briefly to track down a dangerous demon, with his new wife Sam. Riley realized that Buffy had been sleeping with Spike, which caused him to show fleeting jealousy. He admitted to Buffy that he did not like seeing her with Spike and that her problems but none of that changed his strong affection and admiration towards her. He consoled her by meaningfully telling her that she was still the first woman he ever loved and the "strongest woman he'd ever known," describing her as a "hell of a woman."[9]
Dracula — Buffy had immediately taunted him into a fight since he was very clearly a vampire, only for Dracula to express an admiration and attraction towards her. She was shocked to see it was actually Dracula she had met, and deeply flattered to see that she was (according to him) known all over the world. During a meeting with the Scooby Gang, Buffy showed an attraction to his "dark, penetrating eyes" and "lilty accent," much to Riley's jealousy. While she still regarded him as an enemy he seduced her in her bed using his thrall and she allowed him to at very least bite her. The next day, Buffy was extremely disturbed and uncomfortable by her moment of weakness, and would later set out to find him with the intent to defeat him. She had been successfully seduced enough again for her to drink some of his blood, realizing at the moment the inner darkness her slayer roots had in them. At this revelation, Buffy overcame the thrall and proceeded to furiously fight with Dracula until he eventually ran away. She did, however, thank him for helping her realize that she did have darkness in her power[96] and would later become involved with Dracula again in the comics to rescue Xander from his service and as an ally against a Japanese vampire cult.[101]
Ben Wilkinson — Buffy met Ben when her mother was diagnosed with a brain tumor. They flirted a bit during a Hawaiian-themed college party but never dated, because Buffy didn't want to define herself by her lack of a relationship.[102] Also he was one half of a hell goddess, Glory, meaning Buffy had dodged a bullet by rejecting him. She would contact him again so he could give treatment to Giles who had been severely injuried while they were fighting against the Knights of Bzyantium, immensely grateful that he had saved his life.[51] Once he was revealed to share the same body as Glory and reverted to his human form, Buffy chose to spare his life despite Glory re-emerging since she could never bring herself to kill a innocent.[52]
Richard — A guy Anya invited to Buffy's 21st birthday party (much to Buffy's dismay), Buffy briefly flirted with him but was distracted by a very jealous Spike who she for the most part ignored. However it doesn't go anywhere as Richard got seriously hurt and was too unnerved by what he went through to talk to Buffy again.[103]
R.J. Brooks — Buffy, under the influence of a love spell develops a brief, powerful obsession with this high school quarterback, along with Dawn, Willow, and Anya. She betrayed her sister's trust by seducing RJ in an empty classroom, and almost killed Principal Wood to prove her love to him. The spell is broken when Spike and Xander destroy the enchanted letterman jacket.
Satsu — As Buffy trained newly activated Slayers, a young girl named Satsu became her closest ally. Satsu fell in love with Buffy; when Amy Madison put Buffy in the influence of a sleep spell, which could only be broken by the kiss of true love, it was Satsu who awakened Buffy from her mystical sleep.[104] Realizing this, Buffy talked to Satsu, telling her that she was flattered to know she felt that way about her, but was not gay herself.[12] Despite this, Buffy ended up having sex with Satsu, in a moment she described as a "wonderful night" but claimed would go no further. However, Buffy did spend a second night with Satsu as a "goodbye."[101] By some advice from Kennedy, Satsu was resolved to move on from Buffy,[105] but was visibly hurt and disgusted when she realized Buffy was having sex with Angel.[40]
Robert Dowling — Buffy and S.F.P.D. detective Robert Dowling initially got on the wrong foot, as he and his partner were investigating a series of murders that pointed to the Slayer. She was quickly seen as a "person of interest" then a fugitive from the law after escaping from police custody. Having already had a suspicion of the existence of vampires, he fully knew after seeing Buffy stake a zompire. However, Buffy and Dowling quickly realized that it was actually Severin who was the culprit; subsequently saving Buffy from being drained of her powers and clearing her of all charges against her, for which Buffy was grateful.[106] The first possible hints of Dowling's feelings for Buffy were noted by Spike, stating that he had an attraction towards her.[107] After regularly helping her with zompire patrolling, Dowling asked her out on a date. Buffy was surprised at this, nonetheless displaying a slight attraction to him herself. Xander and Dawn took notice of this, Buffy however immediately denied their words. Despite her verbal protests, she promised him "breakfast later" anyway, seemingly agreeing to go on the date. Before anything could go out, she was teleported away in the middle of a battle.[108] After the end of zompire crisis, Buffy paid him a visit in fear he was resentful for her disappearance. She was surprised, though, when he was happy to see her, and understanding of her busy absence. Buffy explained, in reference to Riley, she had a boyfriend before whose, despite his training, both life and morals were threatened by her life as a Slayer, and, because of this destructive pattern of his life, she couldn't go forward with Dowling. In return, he simply accepted and said this way was better for both, who would work together for the supernatural task force, and he was glad they were friends. This shocked Buffy, who expected a worse reaction, and promptly blamed herself for not being able to be with someone as normal as him.[45] Their relationship quickly turned into professional camaraderie in their shared supernatural investigations, and he continued to root for her relationship with his friend Spike.
Friendship
“A slayer with family and friends. That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure.”
On her first day at Sunnydale High, Buffy was shown to sympathize with Willow being a loner and school outcast, especially after Cordelia Chase had cruelly bullied her. She had immediately tried to be friends with her, but then realized that she couldn't hang out with her and Cordelia. She gave her advice on dating and saved her life from vampires, which is when they started to bond.[18] Buffy and Willow became best friends, even sisterly, and when stumbling on magics of how to re-ensoul Angel, she had heartily agreed, wanting to bring Angel back for Buffy. Over the years they develop a extremely close, tight bond and have risked their lives for each other on many occasions. When Willow had realized that Angel returned from hell and Buffy was taking care of him, she was not judgmental or angry like the others, seemingly only worried about Buffy's well-fare. Willow was also there for Buffy when Angel broke up with her, feeling angry at Angel for hurting her but also believed he was right to leave her.[25] Both enrolled in UC Sunnydale, Buffy felt great sympathy for Willow when Oz left her, likening it to what she went through with Angel and stood by her in time in need, encouraging her and comforting her. Willow was also very protective of Buffy when she realized Riley carried an interest in her, giving him advice but also warning him if he emotionally hurt her, "she would beat him to death with a shovel."[85]
However, Buffy and Willow grew distant from each other, as Buffy was so focused on her new relationship with Riley that she grew apart from her friends. Buffy was also clearly uncomfortable and uneasy to hear that Willow was now a lesbian, but nonetheless encouraged her and told her she was okay with it.[29] After Spike playing on the Scoobies' insecurities, Willow and Buffy (as well as Xander) broke into a massive argument with each other. Willow accused Buffy of seeing them as too useless to help them fight, as well as being uneasy of her relationship with Tara. Buffy denied her claim of being judgemental, and insisted that none of them would be able to help her against Adam without getting killed. Claiming that it made sense to her now why slayers didn't have friends, Buffy walked out to find someone she could trust.[31] Unsettled by how easily Spike had broke them apart, Buffy promised to Willow and her other friends to "never not talk again." Willow also apologized for keeping her relationship with Tara a secret to Buffy and everyone else, making peace with each other.[95] After falling catatonic, Buffy admitted to Willow in her mind that she blamed herself for Dawn's capture because some part of her had wanted it to happen, unable to bear all the pressure of protecting her against an invulnerable Glory any longer. However, Buffy came to her senses and Willow managed to convince her to return to the real world where she was needed.[109]
When Buffy had died, Willow was distraught even to resurrect Buffy as she had never considered any other option at the time, and was at first happy that it worked in the end but felt new found guilt that she had ripped her from Heaven. Buffy had at first kept it as secret to everyone except Spike, as she didn't want to burden them with guilt, though a part of her resented her friends for bringing her back. When reminiscing about bringing Buffy back years later, Willow admitted that she had never, even for a second, regretted bringing Buffy back, but sadly thinks she wouldn't say the same about it.[110] When told by Tara that Buffy had been sleeping with Spike, she was not angry; just confused and concerned over it, unlike Xander.[59] After Tara was murdered and Willow turned dark, she was scornful and cruel towards Buffy, even resulting in a full-out fight with her.[111] After Willow was stopped from destroying the world, Buffy in the end forgave a guilt-ridden Willow, renewing their friendship with continued support and faith in her from Buffy. In the end, Buffy freely admitted Willow being one of the strongest people she knew and she helped her create slayers all throughout the world by putting power through the scythe.[2]
A year and a half after the destruction of Sunnydale, the two became so close that Willow was able to share her power with Buffy.[104] Despite Buffy's recent sexual experience with another woman, both insisted that they are not attracted to each other, but this did not stop Kennedy from being suspicious when the duo shared a hug after Buffy's return from the future. Ironically, in this future, Buffy was the one to finally end Willow's life.[112] At one point, Willow also curiously asked Satsu what Buffy was like in bed, but Satsu refused to answer, too embarrassed.[101] Following the end of magic, Willow disapproved of Buffy's decision to destroy the seed, believing the Earth to be dying without magic.[43] Buffy was upset by this and they grew apart a little, until Willow admitted to Buffy that she was never angry with her for destroying the Seed of Wonder and Buffy insisted that they will bring magic back to the world.[113]
Willow and Buffy began to slightly rekindle their strained relationship, only for Willow to leave immediately to find a way to return magic. She visited her in a dream and reassured her that she would come back. Buffy woke up, only to find her best friend having already left and merely leaving a note. She was disappointed by Willow's swift departure, admitting she would've liked a "second goodbye."[113] A few months later, she returned to San Francisco with her magic and the scythe intact. After Willow healed a new scar from Koh's magic blade on Buffy's forehead, the two tearfully hugged.[42] Buffy and Willow exchanged deep heart-to-heart conversations as the witch briefly stabilized Dawn. While Willow expressed her complete and utter forgiveness of her destruction of the seed, Buffy admitted regretfully to her that Xander was right in some way about her responsibility during the Twilight period last year, knowing she should've made better decisions and asked more questions over what she was really doing back then.[114] Willow also reassured Buffy that if it wasn't for the decisions she made, Willow would not have been able to learn how to not be afraid of her powers. However, once they got inside the Deeper Well, Willow discovered that within it contains a power that will not only restore magic to Dawn, but also to the whole world. Willow insisted that Buffy must separate with her in order for her to discover such a power. Buffy was reluctant, telling Willow how sad she was when she left her when she needed her the most and teared up knowing that she would do it again. In the end, Buffy allowed Willow to go on her own, with the witch reassuring Buffy that she will not let her down this time.[115]
Although Buffy did not return Xander's romantic feelings for her, she once flirted and danced seductively with him,[116] although she later confessed that this was an attempt to make Angel jealous.[117] Later, under a love spell, Buffy attempted to seduce Xander in the school library. When the love spell was broken, she was grateful that Xander did not take advantage of the situation.[118] Also, 1775 Buffy found Xander more attractive than Angel.[119] Eventually, Xander moved past his feelings for Buffy but remained fiercely loyal and protective of her. Buffy and Xander develop a very close, strong friendship, Xander being one of her best friends besides Willow. Upon the disastrous affair with Parker, Xander had tried his utmost to comfort her with little success.[84] Xander had also attempted to kiss Buffy when they were undercover in The Initiative in order to "not draw attention to them." Buffy quickly pushed him away and was immensely annoyed, since it would only draw more attention to them. Xander was embarrassed, but remained unrepentant and defensive over his mistake.[90]
Manipulated by Spike, Xander had a fierce revolt against her when she initially refused to allow them fight against Adam. Buffy was alarmed and annoyed to see him turn against her when he accused her of wanting him out of way and acting superior towards everyone. Buffy would also express her annoyance that Xander had carelessly told Riley about her personal issues with Angel, seeing it as none of his business. She was adamant with her words, and declated she knew now why slayers weren't supposed to have friends. Walking out on them, she went to find Riley.[31] The two soon reconciled, and united together against Adam.[95] Later, Xander had also gave advice concerning her relationship falling apart with Riley but it was too late at that point.[8] Buffy would also appear comically fond of his relationship with Anya and had uncontrollably burst into tears when Tara told her the two had a small fight, but this was mostly Buffy reeling from her break-up with Riley and projecting it on them.[100] When Buffy realized that Spike had an unsettling obsession with her, she began to wonder if something was wrong with her and seemed very dismayed with her personal life. Xander, however, comforted her, insisting that there was nothing wrong with her and that if she was just Buffy, someone would see her amazing heart and fall in love with her and Buffy, touched at his words, hugged him. She had also danced with Xander playfully at a party in an effort to cheer her up, which had helped her feel better.[102]
Buffy and Xander's relationship became strained however when Xander had discovered that she had been sleeping with Spike, feeling hurt and angry that Buffy hadn't trusted him enough to tell him. Buffy insisted that he didn't want to know anyway and that it was none of his business. However, they made peace when Xander acknowledged that he wouldn't have reacted positively if she told him earlier anyway and how hard it has been since her resurrection, but Buffy soon after was shot by Warren Mears.[59] Xander was seen immensely worried over her and was very relieved when she survived.[120] Xander was also protective of Buffy and held great distrust towards Spike, upon the discovery that he had attempted to rape her. During the battle with The First, when being criticized by the Potential Slayers, Xander had spoke up and defended Buffy, saying that he had seen her kind and caring heart, and that she cares about them more than they will ever know.[121] Buffy herself has stated the Xander is someone she trusts completely and with her life.[36] While just close friends there are comments made in a dream of Buffy's referring to a sexual relationship between them, with Buffy going as far as to proposition and kiss him before the dream wackiness escalates.[104] Buffy begins to realize she has feelings for Xander but she is too late as he has started a relationship with her sister Dawn. When Buffy confessed to Xander, he doubted the strength of her feelings, noting that she went through a lot of romantic possibilities including experimentation with Satsu before settling on her best friend.[16] Buffy was upset and regretful over this, but understood his feelings. Following the end of magic, Buffy and Xander's friendship appeared to be slightly deteriorating and more distant than before, causing Buffy to feel isolated.[122]
After Buffy moved back in with Xander and Dawn, they appear to rekindle some of their former closeness. She hanged out with him and her sister under normal circumstances and both light-heartedly teased her over Robert Dowling and whether or not she was into him.[108] However, their revived friendship went downhill fast. When Dawn fell into an incapacitated coma and was on the verge of dying, Buffy attempted to comfort a grief and guilt-filled Xander over their shared pain. Despite her concern, Xander immediately turned on her and blew up, harshly blaming her for all that had happened to make Dawn like this. She was hurt by this, explaining to him that she had no choice but to destroy the seed and end magic. This came as little comfort to him, Xander then proceeding to criticize her of sleeping with Angel, and that was to blame for this. Realizing explaining herself to him won't make him forgive her, a dejected and miserable Buffy promised him she would do all she could to bring Dawn back to the way she was before.[123] After struggling to find others who would help them with Dawn, Buffy tried to persuade a fuming Xander that they had to work together on this. Much to chagrin, he stayed inflexible and unforgiving towards her, refusing to talk to her face to face. Buffy once again argued to him that she was not responsible for Dawn's health, only causing to infuriate him more to the point he stormed out of the apartment. Unbeknownst to her at the time, Xander had made a pact with Severin and Simone to save Dawn from fading away, consequently betraying Buffy and her trust as a result.[42] Not very long after, Xander's secret double-crossing act was blown during their battle in the Deeper Well.
While Xander still believed it would work and did not want Buffy or Willow risking their lives when there was another way, Buffy firmly rejected it, especially once it became clear that if Severin's plan worked, the world would most certainly end due to the tears in the universe. Buffy was angry with his stupid line of thinking, harshly telling him that once again she would have to save the world because of him.[124] Despite Xander's remorse, Buffy still felt betrayed by him and had even held her scythe to his throat much longer than necessary when he had suddenly appeared behind her. After Xander straightforwardly accepted responsibility as well as pointing out that all of them made wrong choices that led them to this, Buffy's attitude softened somewhat and she chose to believe his warning of Simone creating an army.[115]
Other Friendships
Cordelia and Buffy in their Homecoming dresses
Cordelia Chase — Initially, Buffy and Cordelia were on friendly terms, as Cordelia had let her borrow her history book and asked her to join her clique because of her fashion sense. Buffy though disapproved of Cordy's treatment of Willow and according to Willow, "could not legally be friends with a nerd (Willow) and a popular (Cordelia)" , much to Buffy's confusion. This friendliness quickly ended when Buffy had accidentally held Cordelia by a stake, believing her to be a vampire and afterwards Cordelia had decided to "call everyone she had ever met," consequently destroying Buffy's popularity.[18] She then started acting arrogantly to Buffy constantly, thinking she was weird, causing Buffy to develop a medium dislike of her. When joining the Scooby Gang, Cordelia became nicer to her, as she had asked Buffy to accompany her to the Delta Zeta party, claiming that their sisters with "really different hair."(Which is true. Their personalities are somewhat similar and their relationship reflected that of bickering sisters).[79] Despite this and the numerous times Buffy saved her, Cordelia still criticized Buffy and held little hope in their fight against evil, only when she was in danger herself did she actually have faith in Buffy. Surprisingly though, Cordelia seemed to be the most sympathetic and understanding in her own way of Buffy's self-imposed exile after killing Angel, even standing up against Xander. Though she did mean well and just wanted to help, her choice of phrasing seemed to make things worse for Buffy, tactlessly calling Buffy a "freak of nature" and Angel as well.[125] At the time of the Homecoming Dance, Buffy and Cordelia were at war trying to reap votes for the dance, verbally arguing(Buffy even calling Cordy a "vapid whore") but came together and made peace when both were captured by the SlayerFest '98, Cordelia using her confidence to fend off Lyle Gorch (who had mistaken her for Faith) after Buffy killed his wife.[126] After Cordelia and Xander split, Buffy expressed sympathy and understanding towards Cordy's hurt emotions, and encouraged her to be with friends as it helped heal. Cordelia however, reacted hostilely towards her and blamed Buffy for all the bad things that happened to her since she met her. This caused Cordelia to make a wish that Anya granted that Buffy had never come to Sunnydale which had caused her to die in that universe but before that she admitted that things had been better when Buffy was there.[127] Despite this, she showed Buffy occasional acts of kindness such as physically defending Buffy when she was weak, immediately agreeing to drive a distressed and weakened Buffy home with no complaints[128] and helped fight against The Mayor.[24] Upon Buffy's reunion with Angel in Los Angeles, she had asked Cordelia how she was and Cordelia had nervously replied she was fine, soon after leaving Angel and Buffy alone. Cordelia and Buffy argued with each other again later that day. Cordelia accused Buffy of being immature and selfish for thinking she could have both Angel and still save the world. However, she allowed Buffy to find Angel to help him. Since that part of the day was erased, Buffy didn't remember her talk with her.[28] While they never saw each other again, Buffy would once compare Glory to Cordelia, referring to their sense of dress and shallow personalities.[129] Upon Buffy's death, Cordelia was devastated and admitted to Angel that she missed her.[130] She was also overjoyed when Buffy was revealed to be alive,[131] but this did not stop her from mocking her relationship with Angel.[132] Buffy was also told at some point that Cordelia had passed on. In a dream, Buffy (who had been thrown back in 1997) told Willow that some day Cordelia would be dead after she had teased her, saying it rather flippantly.[133] Despite their differences though, Buffy did consider Cordelia a friend and both seemed to care and have respect for each other.
Buffy and Oz discussing her annoying roommate
Oz — Buffy and Oz have always gotten along extremely well. Oz has great respect for Buffy and would always follow her orders without question. When she enrolled in UC Sunnydale, she had confided in him her unbearable roommate Kathy Newman, which raised a cause of concern for Oz how angry she had been.[134] Oz had also agreed without question to give the Gem of Amarra to her ex-boyfriend Angel on Buffy' s order since he had a gig there anyway.[6] Like the other Scoobies, Oz was angry with Parker for using Buffy for sex and "wanted to smack him," expressing sympathy towards her.[26] Buffy liked Oz with Willow, believing him to be good for her at the time and had defended him and Willow's feelings for him against her boyfriend Riley who had a black-and-white view of humans and monsters, insisting that Oz couldn't help the way he was and that love wasn't rational.[29] Years later, Buffy was happy for Oz being able to have a family in Tibet and he had gave some much needed help to them when they were hiding from Twilight, letting them temporally lose their powers.[135]
Buffy and Kendra, two Slayers that existed simultaneously
Kendra Young — The two Slayers at first started as opposing forces. Buffy being annoyed and estranged with Kendra's lack of social skills and tact while Kendra disapproved of Buffy's unrestricted methods of fighting evil and her relationship with the vampire Angel. When they were forced to work together in order to stop Drusilla , Buffy was greatly concerned for Angel while Kendra was more insistent in dealing with the problem in an organized fashion that required being ordered by their Watchers. This led to Kendra abandoning Buffy who then got apprehended by Spike's goons. However, Kendra arrived in the nick of time to aid Buffy in saving Angel. There Kendra witnessed Buffy's love for Angel and helped her carry Angel out the burning building. Upon departing, Buffy lent Kendra her sweater and tried to hug her before Kendra claimed "I don't hug." Kendra did however show approval for her relationship with Angel, on the grounds she that she found him "pretty cute."[136] When Kendra arrived back to Sunnydale, she and Buffy were instantly on friendly terms and at that time both showed affection to one another, Kendra giving Buffy her lucky stake Mr. Pointy. Upon seeing Kendra's dead body, Buffy became devastated, rushing to Kendra's body, holding her hand and stroking her.[77] While mourning Kendra's death, Buffy told Spike that she lost a friend that day.[137]
Anne Steele — Buffy had saved Anne's life from Spike and Drusilla, as Anne had at one point been a vampire worshiper.[76] When Buffy had fled to L.A after killing Angel she met Anne again(who had that point been going by "Lily") and saved her life again from the demonKen after Anne's boyfriend had been killed. This act of heroism inspired Anne so much that she had asked Buffy if she could take her middle name "Anne" as her own. Touched by this, Buffy accepted it and Anne inspired her to go back to Sunnydale to face her friends and family.[21]
Anya Jenkins — When Anya first started going out with Xander, Buffy (like the rest of the Scooby Gang) disliked her and her tactless, inappropriate nature. Anya had noted this but insisted that none of the Scoobies looked down on her, unlike they do Xander.[31] Anya also attempted to give her advice to dump Riley since he wasn't "boring" or "normal," only for Buffy to decline her suggestion.[90] Buffy had also gone to advice for the suspicious adoration of Jonathan, revealing to her the presence of alternate realities. However, Anya expressed slight annoyance to be alone with Buffy without having Xander be there.[93] During an argument with Xander, Buffy would describe Anya as a "lovesick puppy" over him and even said she thought Xander saw her as "convenient."[8] Throughout the years, Buffy and Anya became closer, even friends and after the death of Buffy's mother, a saddened Anya loudly stated "I wish Joyce didn't die!" in an attempt of sympathy. Surprisingly, Buffy did not take offense instead thanking her as she by the that time understood her way of communicating.[138] Following Buffy's death, Anya admitted that she did miss Buffy but life shouldn't stop just because she was dead.[139] Upon Buffy's resurrection, Anya had tried to cheer up a traumatized Buffy by revealing her engagement to Xander but was quickly reprimanded of the inappropriate gesture by Xander. She had also tactlessly kept saying that Buffy had returned from hell, much to everyone's annoyance.[53] Anya had also kindly offered to give Buffy a job at the Magic Box in retail, but after a disastrous day (dubbed the "hour that wouldn't end" by Buffy), she permanently rejected it, since it "bored her to tears."[34] Anya had also expressed her pain at Xander leaving her at the alter, unsuccessfully trying to get Buffy to turn against him. Later, when Buffy and Xander surprise the drunken Anya and Spike in a sexual relation, Buffy defend Anya, establishing to a jealous Xander that she was desperate.[140] Following Anya's return as a vengeance demon and murder of several frat boys, Buffy resolved to kill Anya despite Xander's intervention, and had fought with Anya. Anya had waved off Xander's attempts to stop her and noted that Buffy's pattern is always trying to kill her friends. However, in the end, Buffy didn't kill her as Anya was turned human again.[35] This event seemed to permanently end their friendship as despite sharing with Buffy her jealousy over Xander going out on a date,[141] she had bluntly told Buffy later "Oh, I'm not your friend." Anya had also harshly and openly called Buffy out on thinking she was better than everyone else, saying that she was blessed with special advantages but no one had told her she had deserved them more than anyone else, being one of the many that forced Buffy out of her own house.[62] Years later, when facing D'Hoffryn and a false Anya, Buffy defended her, establishing that the real Anya was just used and never respected by her leader.
Tara comforts a distraught Buffy
Tara Maclay — Buffy initially held no attachment to Tara and was only connected to her through Willow. Upon Tara's birthday, she was distant from Tara and did not know what to get her since she didn't really understand her. However, this began to change when Tara's parents tried to force her to go home, thinking her witch side meant she was a demon. Buffy and the rest of the group stood up for Tara and refused to allow her family to take her against her will. After this event, Tara realized the Scooby Gang was her friends and felt more accepted.[129] Buffy and Tara became more comfortable with each other and they began hanging out in college on some occasions without the company of others. Tara expressed sympathy over her break-up with Riley, explaining that things happened for a reason. Buffy had lost control of her emotions when Tara had mentioned Anya and Xander had a fight, causing her to sob uncontrollably into her shoulder, projecting it to how she had ignored the signs of her own gradual failing relationship with Riley. Tara was confused and uncomfortable at the overreaction, but nonetheless awkwardly comforted her.[100] When Buffy's mother had passed on from an unexpected aneurysm, Tara related to her situation and confessed her mother had died too when she was seventeen. Still numb over Joyce's death, Buffy was nonetheless grateful and questioned how she had felt when it happened.[138] After Tara was brain-sucked into insanity, Buffy's guilt and stress built. She listed it as after Joyce's passing and her impossible fight against Glory, it was becoming too much for her.[51] Tara, like the rest of them, grieved when Buffy passed on but worried about reviving her. After Tara had broken up with Willow, Buffy had told her about Spike's chip not reacting when he had hit her and asked Tara to check if she came back wrong. Tara had told her she didn't but she was different a little after being revived as her soul was channeled back in her body. Buffy had accidentally let it slip out that she had been having sex with Spike while in tears, insisting that it was a mistake. Tara was slightly uncomfortable at this information but placated her by saying it was okay if she did or didn't love him. Buffy, while in tears, confessed to her that she had been using Spike for sex and for her to not "forgive her." Tara had comforted a distraught Buffy and promised she wouldn't tell anyone what she told her,[58] a promise she kept until everyone else had figured it out themselves. Seeing her breakdown, Tara became protective of Buffy towards Spike and often tried to stop Spike's sexual advances on her,[103] the two characters becoming increasingly close afterwards. At her death, Buffy was noticeably sad and, much later, dreamed of Tara telling her "I still blame you for my death;" but it was merely a dream.[142] Buffy has also developed a strong dislike of guns: "I don't like them. They keep killing my friends," a clear reference to Tara's death.[40]
Sam Finn — Buffy initially felt awkward with Sam, as she was now married to Riley, her ex-boyfriend. But, while alone with her, Sam had told her that she was a "legend" in more ways than being the Slayer, expressing admiration towards her, and being very kind to her. Buffy had privately noted to Riley that she " kinda loved her too" and that she did like her, moving past the awkwardness.[9] Sam showed no insecurities towards Buffy, as she was already knew that Riley was hers and she had no reason to be jealous. Later, Sam freely admitted on how Riley would always want to help Buffy and encouraged him to be true to himself and help her, which Riley eventually did despite his initial reservations.[143]
Clem — Buffy first met Clem when Spike had dragged her along to a game of kitten poker but had stayed out of it, instead choosing to be drunk.[34] Given Clem's pleasant and peaceful nature, she invited him to her birthday party and became friends with him.[103] She also trusted him enough to watch over her sister Dawn when Spike had already left.[111] When she was training potentials, they hugged like old friends.[144] Years later, Buffy said in their reunion that it was "almost worth" having Harmony in her apartment to see him.[145]
Robin Wood — Buffy developed an attraction towards Wood and even agreed to go on a date with him. Though their relationship never materialized into anything other than friendship after Buffy found out he was the son of an earlier slayer, Nikki Wood, due to Buffy's unresolved feelings for Spike, which he quickly picked up on after he interrupted their "first date."[141] Their friendship became strained after Wood's efforts to try and kill Spike out of vengeance for his mother. This act caused Buffy to warn him that Spike would kill him next time he tried something like this and that she would let him kill Wood.[146] When Faith revealed that she had slept with Robin, Buffy expressed shock at this which Faith misinterpreted as hurt. Buffy however corrects her statement, insisting that they were just "very good friends" or "mortal enemies, depending on the day."[63] Later, Buffy relocated to San Francisco and goes to him for advice on pregnancy, Wood genuinely saying that she wasn't his mother, as she had done things she never could.[147]
Andrew Wells — Andrew attempted to be a villain in The Trio, doing rather ridiculous stunts in an attempt to finish off the Slayer but repeatedly failing. Eventually, Buffy had let Andrew and Jonathan shelter from Dark Willow who had been out to kill them and afterwards he retreated to Mexico. Upon returning to Sunnydale, he had been captured by Willow who had discovered him with pig's blood. Andrew was then kept as a willing hostage (preferably a "guestage") by the Scoobies, kept tied to a chair at first. Buffy constantly viewed Andrew as a annoyance like everyone else and was disgusted by the fact that he killed Jonathan by orders of The First. When Andrew had been trying to film what she did, Buffy was against it completely, believing what she does too important to film, even threatening to smash his camera over his head. File:Buffy and andrew.jpg
Buffy and Andrew
She had also lead Andrew to believe that she was trying to kill him as blood was needed to quiet the seal but after Andrew, in tears, expressed his guilt over Jonathan's death, Buffy stopped as the seal needed tears, not blood.[148] Once the battle with The First was over, she let Andrew stay with the Scooby Gang, and even ordered him to get the psychotic Slayer Dana by any means necessary.[149] However Buffy seemed to become more used to Andrew's annoying habits and develop a fondness for him, as she had saved him from rogue slayer Simone and forgave him for his previous mistakes, admitting that he was part of the family and should get used to making stupid mistakes with good intentions,[150] causing Andrew to finally feel accepted. She had also invited him to her Scooby Gang meeting, though stated it "was just to be polite," despite genuinely caring about him.[106] However, upon discovering that Andrew had made a Buffybot in order for Buffy to have a normal life (conveniently forgetting about periods and eating habits causing her to believe she was pregnant), Buffy was furious at this despite his good intentions and it noticeably affected their friendship.[151] Despite her anger and annoyance at his plots, Buffy displayed a level of gratitude at how far he had gone for her to have a normal life, touched by it despite herself. However, she had still not fully forgiven him and she made sure Andrew knew that.[66] Later in the year, Andrew tried his best to help her save Dawn's life, something she allowed. However, when he attempted to assure her everything would be fine, Buffy had sarcastically quipped "Be nice to hear that from someone I trust," making it clear she did not trust him and was still bitter over the Buffybot.[42]
Rowena and Leah — Some of her top slayers, Buffy developed comradely with them, but Satsu was her favorite concerning skills.[104]This friendship between them apparently disapated when Buffy destroyed the seed and caused no more slayers to be called.[152]
Anaheed and Tumble — Buffy's roommates after migrating to San Francisco. She seemed to get along well with them, but it was strained after they realized she was the slayer. Fearing for their safety, they made Buffy move out.[113]
Billy Lane — Buffy met Billy through their shared desire to beat back the rise of zompires and the continuous problems that have consequently been plaguing the world since the end of magic. Being practical, she accepted him swiftly and without complaint, even going as far to say that he "belonged."[153] Buffy was not without her limitations for Billy, though. Aware of his young age, she restricted some of his freedom in slaying; it was after all, a highly dangerous profession.[108]
When Buffy was called as the new Slayer, she had made a habit of lying to her mother and hiding slaying from her for a long time. Joyce was quite distressed at her daughter keeping secrets and often worried about her rebellious nature, initially believing Buffy was a delinquent. However when Buffy was attempting to stop Acathla, her mother found out about Buffy's slaying. Overwhelmed, she had initially wanted her to stop slaying but became more used to it over time. Joyce and Buffy have always had a very loving, deep relationship. When Joyce's health was beginning to deteriorate, Buffy was constantly at her side and worried for her very much, relieved when she seemed to becoming better. She however, felt jealousy over Joyce's bond with Dawn, not liking how she was treated as the baby while Buffy constantly had to worry about larger matters. Buffy also convinced herself the the cause of her mother's health was mystical and did a spell to find out what it was, only for her to realize it was nothing supernatural.[154] While her mother's health began to get worse, Buffy was becomingly increasingly more stressed and overwhelmed with the possibility of Joyce dying. She had cried alone several times,[46][155] and consistently tried to associate her mother's condition with magical means. Her relationship with Riley also began to suffer since she was so focused on Joyce that she rarely told him what she was truly feeling or spent time with him.[99] When Joyce's brain tumor was removed, Buffy was glad to see her seemingly well and was mostly at ease.[8]
When Joyce died from an aneurysm, Buffy was the one who found her body and did her best to revive her. Once it was confirmed her mother had died, she was in shock for some time and felt as if nothing was real anymore. She had several daydreams showing her her mother somehow surviving and happy.[138] Buffy also blamed herself entirely for Joyce's death, believing if she had arrived sooner, she would've lived. While talking with Angel, she admitted that her mother was always the strongest one and that she didn't know what to do now that she was gone. Buffy resolved to take the responsibilities her mother had, but struggled to come to terms with grief as well as be strong for everyone else. After a argument with Dawn, Buffy had ran to the door when her her mother was resurrected but Dawn had stopped it already. The reality of her mother's death fully sinking in, Buffy broke down crying with her sister.[32] During a conversation with Giles, Buffy would say she loved her mother more than anything and she didn't know if she had knew that before she died.[50] Joyce's death combined with her fight against Glory and Tara's insanity began to overwhelm Buffy, the continuous setbacks drawing her closer and closer to a depression.[51][109] When dealing with the possibility of killing Dawn to save the world, Buffy asserted her grief and that she just wished her mother was still alive.[52] Much later, Buffy had a strange dream where she had been thrown back in 1997, back when her mother was still alive. Reunited with her mother, Buffy was overjoyed and hugged her, telling her that she loved her and wished she could stay there with her forever.[133]
Hank Summers
Following immediately after her parent's divorce, Buffy often had father/daughter weekends with Hank, though over time this occurrence became less until it vanished completely. Despite being their father, neither Buffy nor Dawn could rely on his promises nor would he play the role of their father, which had caused Buffy to consider Giles as more of a father-figure. Buffy did however, in 1997, spend a summer with him and it was earlier revealed that one of Buffy's nightmares was that her father had divorced Joyce because of her.[156] A few years later, Buffy would attempt to contact her father when Joyce's health was getting worse, but he was unavailable since he was apparently "living the cliche" with his secretary in Spain.[129] She would again try to contact him for her mother's funeral, but her father remained unavailable and didn't show.[32] Hank took on the stereotype of upper class deadbeat dead, and Buffy remained to have a distant relationship with him. Years later, when the sisters were living in San Francisco, Hank was attempted to reconnect through monthly reunions. Announcing he was about to marry again, he communicated his decision to exclude Buffy from their wedding ceremony "for safety reasons," based on her public reputation as a Slayer, which enraged Dawn and saddened Buffy.[157] When Buffy left to be imprisoned in the Safe Zone, she asked Dawn to "fill dad in on everything," implying they still maintained contact.[158]
Buffy and Giles, her Watcher and surrogate father figure
Rupert Giles
Rupert Giles became her watcher upon her move to Sunnydale, posing as the school's high school librarian and had tried to convince a reluctant Buffy to be the Slayer again. Eventually, Buffy gave in and continued slaying as well as being trained by Giles. Giles held originally a negative view on her at first, revealed when Wesley was reading through Giles's early Watcher notes, describing her as "Willful and insolent" and "Her abuse of the English language is such that I can only understand every other sentence,"[159] but developed a close, fatherly bond with Buffy. Giles became the father Buffy always wanted (since hers was never around) and Buffy became the daughter he never had. Their relationship became strained however when, under order of the Watchers Council, he had Buffy go through her Cruciamentum, where she had temporarily lost her powers and had tested her up against a vampire. Buffy was initially disgusted that Giles had betrayed her trust, but then moved when he had stood up to the Watchers Council about it. This act had prompted Giles to be fired from the Watchers Council, as he had a "father's love for Buffy" and was therefore "useless to the cause."[128] Buffy continued to accidently keep Giles out of the loop of some things in her life, prompting him to feel continually left out. Giles was especially hurt and angered when he had not been told that her boyfriend was part of The Initiative. However, their connection and bond remained strong. Having nearly killed Giles in the form of a Fyarl Demon (believing him to be the demon that killed him), Buffy immediately realized it was him when she had stabbed Giles. Buffy would later explain to Giles that she could tell it was him because of his "eyes" and the familiar annoyance they expressed.[88] When informed that Giles had a hobby for singing, Buffy was creeped out and disturbed by the idea, similar to Xander's reaction.[94] Spike had preyed on Giles' insecurities, saying that Buffy treated him without respect and found him useless and fearing that this was true, he had gotten drunk, much to Buffy's annoyance.[31] Giles then told Willow that he was going back to England, believing Buffy to no longer need him as her watcher but was stopped by Buffy, who claimed that she wanted to start training with him again and understand her true nature.[96]The strength of the bond was showcased again when the Watchers Council threatened to deport Giles indefinitely back to England if they did not allow them to analysis her skills as a slayer. Buffy initially complied to these demands, telling Giles that she couldn't lose him.[47]
Due to her insecurities over being a proper guardian, Buffy asked if Giles could take up the position and discipline Dawn instead. Giles had said no, arguing that she was more suitable because she was family. Reluctantly, Buffy agreed.[160] When Giles was nearly killed by Glory while they were on the run, she blamed herself for the misfortune and privately could not understand his faith in her. Buffy contacted Ben immediately to treat him, consequently saving Giles' life.[51] Buffy was, however, furious when Giles suggested killing Dawn if they could not stop Glory, telling him that she would stop him if he hurt her. However, Buffy and Giles reconciled when she confessed to him how difficult life and all of these impossible choices were to her.[52] Upon Buffy's death, Giles was distraught and had agreed to give Anya full ownership of the Magic Box once he had left for England but he never did right away, not wanting to leave but eventually did. However he returned immediately when told of Buffy's revival, immensely happy but also worried about the risk Willow took for the spell. Buffy hugged him and confided in her stress over paying bills, but insisted to a worried Giles she was fine after her resurrection. Though she later admitted that he constantly lying and trying to be okay for him and the others was exhausting.[33] Over time though, Giles worried that he was holding her back from embracing her adult duties and this sadly prompted him to leave for England,[55] being one of the factors that caused an angry, vulnerable, and alone Buffy to embark on a highly destructive sexual relationship with Spike.
Giles though returned and helped her with Dark Willow before leaving again. He helped her with the potentials but disagreed with Buffy keeping Spike alive, believing him to be too dangerous and that Buffy's feelings for him were clouding her judgement. He had gone behind Buffy's back and agreed to let Robin Wood kill Spike, which had caused their relationship to be strained.[146] After the destruction of Sunnydale, they weren’t in speaking terms, and he harshly dismissed her whenever she tried to reach him. They then went through another setback when Giles had chosen Faith's side over hers, after Faith had almost killed during a undercover mission.[161] It was revealed, though, that Giles was secretly researching about the Twilight prophecy, and, as pointed by Angel, the watcher knew Buffy's certain future involvement in its creation. He also confessed to Faith he was searching for a totem able to kill a god "if they grew too powerful," implying he would stop Buffy with her own death if she had taken another path during the Twilight crisis.[40]
They eventually made peace in their reunion,[162] only for Giles to have his neck snapped by a Twilight-possessed Angel. Buffy was grief-stricken by seeing her beloved watcher and father-figure getting killed, prompting her to destroy the Seed of Wonder.[41] In his will, Giles gave everything to Faith, except the Vampyr book, left to Buffy, which Faith interpreted as Giles seeing Buffy stronger than her and the true Slayer.[163] After his eventual resurrection by Angel and Faith, Giles communicated his decision to return to Buffy, explaining the point in his life when he was at his best was with her.[164] Then living in San Francisco, when Buffy returned distraught from her reunion with her father, Giles defended her, declaring she was an exceptional woman more than capable of forging her own path, and she didn't need Hank, himself, or anyone else; so they shared an emotional hug.[157]
A young Buffy was upset that she had a sibling when Dawn was born, feeling like her parents would forget about her. However, she also showed a fondness for her and asked if she could take care of Dawn.[109] Several years later, Buffy had a strained sibling relationship with Dawn at first. Buffy was annoyed with how her mother always treated Dawn like the baby and Dawn envied how Buffy seemed to get special treatment at times.[97] Buffy's annoyance and envy of Dawn grew even more, tired of being the "grown-up" while Dawn constantly got off easy. Through a magical spell to find out what was wrong with her mother, Buffy inadvertently realized that Dawn was not really her sister. Buffy was hostile towards her and immediately demanded to know who she was, much to Dawn's hurt and anger. When told by a monk that Dawn was The Key and that they had manipulated everyone's memories to think she existed from the start, Buffy was uncertain, upset that her life was so easily toyed with, even demanding they remove the memories. However, Buffy made a strained peace with her sister and took up the mantle of being Dawn's protector from Glory.[154]
Deciding to keep the truth about Dawn a secret from everyone but Giles, Buffy became extremely overprotective of Dawn and refused to almost never let her out of her sights. Dawn was greatly annoyed with this, and could not understand why Buffy had become so extreme.[129] After Dawn realized she was The Key and inflicted physical harm over herself, Buffy was worried and felt helpless. She nonetheless seemed understanding of it and told her mother the best thing they could do for her was leave her be. When Dawn ran out on her own at night, Buffy immediately went to find her and expressed regret that she hadn't told her sister the truth from the beginning, partly because of Spike. After beating off Glory again, Buffy snapped Dawn out of her depression, honestly saying that even if she wasn't real, she still loved her and saw her as her sister.[48]
Following her mother's death, Buffy took it upon herself to be strong for Dawn and worried more about her than herself. It was revealed that Buffy had some kind of mental link with her sister, having sensed Dawn was in danger from a vampire despite not being with her.[138] Following her mother's death and Dawn's abandonment issues, Buffy tearfully told her how much she was suffering from her loss but could not help feeling like the one who had to take care of everyone now. Dawn's belief that Buffy was avoiding her disappeared and the two reached an understanding through their mutual grief, sobbing while comforting each other.[32] Spike once said that if anything ever happened to Dawn, it would destroy her.[50] Buffy began to worry she was not grown up enough to be a guardian for her and unsuccessfully tried to convince Giles to take the role. Forced, Buffy tried her best to enforce Dawn's schoolwork like her mother used to, but came off too overbearing and mostly displeased Dawn.[160]
When she was discovered by Glory, Buffy took the Scooby Gang and left Sunnydale in a desperate attempt to protect her sister. She battled fiercely against the Knights of Byzantium who wanted to kill Dawn, killing ten of them and threatening to kill another despite her moral code. She was outraged at how they viewed her as a thing and tried to be there for Dawn when she wondered if she was a destroyer of the universe. When she was caught by Glory, Buffy was overcome with guilt and fell catatonic.[51] In her mind, Buffy confessed to Willow that though she loved her sister, she had one moment of weakness and preferred Dawn dying after losing to Glory rather than continuing protecting her against someone so powerful. She stated that she had saw it as relief and that while she would grieve, it'd be finished. Buffy would reflect on this with intense shame, deducing that some part of her had intentionally let Dawn get caught. Willow, however, argued that she was being too hard on herself and that it was just guilt, nothing more.[109] When she realized that Dawn was the one to open the portal to Glory's dimension and the way to stop that would be to kill her, Buffy refused, insisting that she would kill anyone who tries to kill Dawn and that she will not sacrifice Dawn's life. Buffy also described Dawn as more than a sister to her, that their relationship was physical and she felt as if she's a part of her. When Dawn tried to sacrifice herself in order to close the portal, Buffy stopped her, telling her that she will always love her and for her to life, effectively sacrificing her life instead of her sister's.[52]
When Buffy was resurrected, Dawn was ecstatic, but, over time, began to worry that she was intentionally ignoring and never being around her (as Buffy was with Spike). Buffy eventually told her that wasn't the case, and that she wanted to see her sister grow up and see the world, and eventually began training her in patrols. During the final battle with The First, Buffy ordered Xander to take her away from the fight, much to Dawn's chagrin, and left her a letter saying that "everything I do is for you."[63] Despite Buffy's great love for her sister, Buffy later admitted that if she had to sacrifice Dawn to save the world, she would this time, as her duty as the Slayer was far more important than her personal feelings.[146] Dawn and Buffy grew distant as Dawn became a giant, worried that Buffy was so caught up with her new "Slayer sisters" that she completely forgot about her, even seeing Willow as a better sister than Buffy at the time.[104] However this eventually went away due to Dawn and Buffy reconciling,[165] and following the end of magic, Dawn and Xander had let Buffy live in their apartment with her temporarily until she decided to move out.[43]
When Dawn began to fade away, Buffy became desperate to save her sister, promptly journeying to the Deeper Well to restore magic in the world and allow her existence.[166] When they eventually started living together again, their relationship became closer than ever, leaving their past disputes and distrusts, respecting and defending each other's decisions, and expressing her love more openly. Buffy revealed she couldn't get through a day without Dawn when their mother died, and at the moment she was so happy because the two sisters were together again and helped each other through hard moments.[167] Despite their reunion with their father, Dawn said to Buffy her constant presence in her life in her most decisive time, contrary to Hank, made her the only true family she had left, while Buffy often commented her desire to enable Dawn to live a better and normal life.[157][168] Although, uring to an ambush by demon lords, Dawn volunteered herself to use her Key powers and be left behind, arguing Buffy always sacrificed herself for her and she always wished to be that brave, and that was her chance. Despite Spike's protests, Buffy agreed with her sisters, explaining she was an adult and that was decision, and she was proud of her for that.[169] Buffy also expressed pride of her sister's academic success.[74]
Antagonistic
Darla — Darla had an immediate dislike of her, Buffy being a Slayer of course. Though it was also because her former lover Angel had feelings for Buffy, which disgusted her. She had attempted to kill Buffy's mother Joyce which had caused Buffy great anger towards Darla. When meeting and hearing that she was Angel's sire, being comparatively older than him, Buffy claimed Darla looked a little "worn around the eyes" (obviously referring to her vampiric visage). Darla had then tried to kill Buffy but was killed by Angel instead.[19] Four years later, Darla now human, expressed jealousy towards Buffy, furious that she had made Angel happy and she couldn't, reasoning that she was "just new."[170]
The Master — The Master was an object of great fear towards Buffy as she had a nightmare of their confrontation and her lose at his will. Her fear of him was combined with her fear of being buried underground during the astral projection of a child's dream.[156] Though faced with the odds of being killed by him, Buffy still confronted the Master as her quick-witted self, but was easily killed. When brought back, Buffy readily confronted him and ended as the victor. Nonetheless, Buffy still feared the Master, dreaming of him posing as Giles and attacking her. This finally ended when she smashed his bones, preventing his return.[116]
Principal Snyder — Principal Snyder had a natural hatred towards teenagers but it was Buffy he especially disliked. He had constantly viewed her as a rebellious delinquent and more than often, expected her to be expelled from Sunnydale High. He could not understand Giles' faith in her and was often riding Buffy for every little suspicious thing she did (which was a lot as Buffy was caught by him many times trying to save students and being the Slayer). Buffy in turn found him a constant bane in her school life as her friends did and often mocked him. Snyder took great pleasure in expelling her and preventing her from returning. When Snyder was eaten by The Mayor-turned giant snake, she showed little remorse.[24]
Drusilla — Once she arrived at Sunnydale, Drusilla had immediate fear concerning Buffy. Not only because she was the Slayer, but also because she was Angel's lover, her pseudo-father. Contrary to Darla, the antagonism between the women was demonstrated more subtly. For the simple reason that they had very few verbal interactions and only two confrontations. Drusilla was a dark mirror to her, the person that she could be if Angelus did to Buffy what he did to Drusilla. Both had prophetic powers, loved the same men and have multiples issues where they have fear to be alone and abandoned. Both represent a key point into Spike's destiny. On one hand, Buffy seemed to feel sorry of Drusilla, knowing her tragic past with Angelus but she was not ready to forgive her Kendra's death. Interestly, Buffy don't consider like a love rival in contrast with Darla, only like an ennemy. It was demonstrated when the two women were enchained by Spike wanting to demonstrate his love for the Slayer by dusting Drusilla. However, Buffy was schocked by the demonstration, treating Spike like miserable and sick.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce — Wesley became Buffy and Faith's Watcher after Giles was fired for interfering with the former's Cruciamentum. Buffy, who was already furious at the Watchers Council for temporarily taking away her Slayer powers, showed absolutely no respect for Wesley, making it clear that she saw Giles as her (unofficial) Watcher and mocking him whenever she had the chance.[159] Buffy's hatred for Wesley deepened when Wesley, offended that the Scoobies didn't tell him about Faith killing a human civilian, sent in a bunch of Watcher operatives to capture her, unaware that Angel was about to get through to her and make her realize the severity of her actions; when Wesley later asked them what he could do to help, Buffy snidely replied, "You still got your ticket back to the mother country (England)?"[171] Wesley got under the Scoobies' skin again when he suggested that they should let Willow die at the Mayor's hands than hand over the Box of Gavrok, which was essential for the Mayor's ascension.[172] The final straw came, however, when Buffy asked Wesley to ask the Council's assistance to save Angel, who was shot by Faith with a lethal poison and slowly dying. When Wesley replied that the Council refused to help Angel on the grounds that he was a vampire, an enraged Buffy cut off all ties from the Council and told him that she wasn't taking his orders anymore.[173] Despite this, Wesley offered his services in the final fight against the Mayor, saying that he wasn't helping on the orders of the Council, but only wanted to help. Buffy's cold attitude to him softened a bit afterwards, saying that "it was a start."[24] Wesley revealed to Angel later that he was fired from the Council, since he had "two Slayers in (his) care" and that one was comatose (Faith) while the other refused to follow the Council (Buffy).[174] When Buffy and Wesley later met in Los Angeles, Buffy showed no outright hostility towards him, though this was likely due to the fact that she was focused on capturing Faith at the time.[30] Buffy has since not commented on Wesley since his death.
Kathy Newman — Buffy's first roommate in UC Sunnydale, she had intense hatred towards Kathy. This is because of the certain rather annoying quirks that she had and Buffy hated. Her hatred towards her eventually grew into a psychosis, but this was ultimately taken care of when Kathy had been sent to another dimension, much to Buffy's satisfaction. Her roommate was then replaced with her Buffy's best friend Willow.[134]
Harmony Kendall — Harmony, being part of Cordelia's clique, had a natural disdain for Buffy. Upon turning into a vampire after Graduation, Harmony attempts to be more independent after leaving Spike and tried to be Buffy's arch-nemesis. Buffy viewed Harmony as a nuisance and an annoyance (ironically, Harmony was a vampiric incarnation of her own personna before she become the Slayer), even bursting out laughing when finding out Harmony had minions and wanted to kill her. However she became much more serious when Harmony kidnapped Dawn (who had a plan to use her sister as bait and then kill her), but was quickly thwarted by Buffy, taunting her by saying she being bad as a head cheerleader, being really bad at homecoming queen, but completely sucking by trying to be evil.[97] Harmony also hated Buffy for being the object of Spike's obsession/affections, shown to be very disgusted when hearing about him being involved with Buffy a couple years later.[175] However, Harmony had actually developed a certain respect for her rival. Comically, when she tried to change the magic rules for herself, one of her wishes was to convert the Slayer into a three-way partnership with Angel and Spike. When she began a relationship with Spike and travelled in his mind, Buffy was somewhat disguted and jealous that the two had a brief sexual encounter in London although this fact was before their reconciliation.
Maggie Walsh — Her professor at UC Sunnydale, Buffy initially held her in high regard and esteem despite her stern teachings. She had, on one occassion, defiantly reprimanded Walsh when she showed an extremely unsympathetic attitude toward Willow who had still been grieving over Oz's departure.[85] However, she also described the woman as "the smartest person she ever met" and that "she had better things to do than hang around with kids," unintentionally hurting a unemployed and left out Giles. Despite this, Buffy refused to have The Initiative and Professor Walsh conflict how she slayed and did things, raising conflict with her and Riley's loyalty to The Initiative.[88] Buffy was put into a series of tests and given the tour of The Initiative, coming to odds with Walsh frequently with all the questions she asked. Buffy realized that Maggie Walsh had plotted her death by setting a trap and successfully overcoming it, proceded to threaten and taunt her over her abilities as a slayer.[89] After Professor Walsh was killed by Adam, Buffy made it clear to Riley she was not happy she was gone and was deeply offended that he would even think she was.[90]
Glory — Glory was obsessed with finding the key, which was actually Dawn, Buffy's little sister. Buffy hated Glory, comparing her to Cordelia, and was very determined to protect Dawn with her life. Glory and Buffy got into many fights, until she eventually found out who the key is. Relentless, she forced Buffy and her friends to be on the run. Buffy became increasingly more hopeless, admitting that Glory would beat her and some part of her wanted her to win so she wouldn't have to deal with the constant pressure.[109] In the end they had a final fight but Buffy refused to kill her, having reverted to Ben, an innocent human.[52]
Warren Mears — Buffy had initially saved him and helped him with the sex bot April,[102] but this did nothing to Warren as he decided to want to become a villain, forming The Trio. He, Andrew, and Jonathan had unsuccessfully tried to kill Buffy a lot, even injecting Buffy with a liquid that made her think she was imagining Sunnydale and it's monsters.[176] He had also attempted to frame Buffy into the murder of his ex-girlfriend who he himself had killed, even convincing Buffy herself was the one responsible. Humiliated at this loss, he had bought a gun and shot Buffy, almost killing her.[59] until saved by Willow. Despite her open disgust towards Warren's murder of Tara as well as attempted murder of her, Buffy was against killing Warren, since he was human and that being The Slayer didn't give her a license to kill non-supernaturals.[177] After being flayed alive by Willow and brought back skinless thanks to witch Amy Madison. he bore a considerable grudge against both Willow and Buffy for ruining all his schemes. He had even teamed up with General Voll to take down Buffy and her army.
Kennedy — Due to Kennedy's outspoken and confrontational personality, she had often verbally clashed with Buffy over her decisions as leader. Buffy, used to being leader as well as people naturally following her orders, found this frustrating and annoying. She has respect for Kennedy's Slayer skills but also has a natural dislike for her and her ways. During the mutiny against Buffy, she was instrumental in forcing Buffy out of her own house and appointing Faith the leader over her,[178] but accepted her back to the fold with open arms after Faith led them into a near-fatal trap, even agreeing with the other Potentials' assessment that they had been punished for following Faith and shunning Buffy.[36] Realizing that Buffy had a lesbian experience with Satsu, Kennedy had immediately told her to stay away from Willow, calling her a "lez faux" and remained openly suspicious of their relationship, despite both Willow and Buffy loudly denying any attraction to each other.[112] However, despite her mild dislike of her, when seeing a flying Buffy in mid-air, Kennedy was surprised to realize she found the action hot and attractive.[135] Following the end of magic, Buffy surprisingly felt sympathy when Willow had broken up with Kennedy and had even defended her against her, believing that their relationship was more than just Willow being magical (which she felt owed her a lot of credit since she rarely ever took Kennedy's side); consequently though, Kennedy had blamed Buffy for everything that happened.[43] Despite this, it was revealed that though she still held a grudge against her, Kennedy was the only known Slayer she kept in contact with following the end of magic,[113] and she would later reunite with Kennedy in Deepscan. They seemed to form a truce but still clashed with each other, as Kennedy criticized her of not knowing how to do anything but slaying[179] and soon after, blamed Buffy for being so focused on saving the world that she allowed other people to die, like she did with Giles. This remark prompted a furious Buffy to punch her in the face, giving her a black eye, angrily insisting that no one was dying. After saving Theo Daniels and destroying TinCan, Kennedy surprisingly praised her for her efforts, even giving her a check and promotion, only for Buffy to politely decline, wanting to find her own way.[179]
Simone Doffler — Buffy greatly disliked Simone, mainly because the younger, violent Slayer preferred using modern weapons such as guns (which Buffy hated), but also because Simone believed that Slayers should use their abilities for their own benefit rather than helping mankind. Simone's selfish and depraved activities, which included robbery and murder, helped boost the already-bad name Slayers had amongst the press, and turned countless people against Buffy (who was considered equally bad by just being a Slayer).[12] Simone eventually went rogue and kidnapped Andrew. Buffy fought against her and saved him, only for Simone to run away.[150] As time went on, Simone became a bigger threat and now resolved to kill Buffy, eventually turning herself into a vampire and nearly succeeding in doing so. However, in the end, Buffy gained the upper hand, mocked Simone for having become the exact opposite of what a Slayer should be, and staked her.
Other
Jenny Calendar — Buffy's relationship with Jenny Calendar was a teacher/student-type. Buffy held Jenny with respect and seemed to like her, supporting Giles' relationship with her, genuinely realizing how happy she made him. Upon Angel's time as Angelus, Jenny felt guilty and believed she could have stopped or at least delayed it. Buffy, however,was furious and blamed her for the loss of Angel's soul, ostracizing her completely afterwards,[180] until eventually forgiving her for Giles sake. She expressed great sympathy towards Buffy's emotional state of mind, and had tried her utmost to find a way to return Angel's soul. She had eventually find the spell needed for her goal, wanting to make it up to both Buffy and Angel. Unfortunately, Jenny's neck was snapped by Angelus and when told of this, Buffy felt crushing guilt over Jenny's fate, and admitted to Giles that she was sorry that she couldn't kill Angel before that happened.[181]
Whistler — Buffy had at first regarded Whistler with hostility, threatening immediately to "tear out his ribcage and wear it as a hat," and found certain quirks of his personality exasperating and annoying. But gave Buffy advice on her being prepared for certain consequences that later came to pass. He also admitted a physical attraction to her, saying that he now understood why Angel had lost his soul in her.[77] This, however, did not stop Whistler from encouraging Angel to take up the alias of "Twilight" and lead the forces against Buffy, her friends, and her Slayer army. Admittedly, Whistler informed Angel that in all the futures he saw with his clairvoyant powers, Buffy and Angel would die if they worked together, and that the only way they could live was for Angel to become Buffy's enemy.[143] Following the end of magic, Whistler blamed Angel for rejecting his role in the Twilight prophecy, at the time unaware that it was Buffy who convinced Angel to do so by rejecting her role as well.[40] Unbeknownst to Buffy, Whistler had caused Angel to meet her the day she was called because both of them were inevitably fated to meet for the sake of the ancient prophecy consisting of recreation, centering around both herself and a vampire with a soul, specifically Angel.[182]
Jonathan Levinson – During her years at Sunnydale High, Buffy saved Jonathan's life many times from demonic forces, including (but not limited to) the revived mummy of an Incan princess and parasitic, face-hugging demons. These rescues did not go unnoticed, since Jonathan was the person to give Buffy an award for saving the lives of many Sunnydale High students time and again.[25] Also, when Jonathan prepared to kill himself out of despair and wanting to be recognized, Buffy confronted him and talked him out of it (though she mistakenly believed that he was planning to commit murder), and, several months after high school, Buffy lectured Jonathan on the consequences of his using a spell to make everyone adore him.[183][93] Jonathan became Buffy's enemy when he joined The Trio, although, unlike Warren and (at first) Andrew, Jonathan wasn't interested in killing her at all, due to his gratitude for her saving his life countless times (as well as the fact that he found her "hot"). When Warren went overboard and began killing innocent people, Jonathan decided to betray the group, and told Buffy how to defeat Warren (who developed super-powers through the Orbs of Nezzla'Khan).[59] Buffy's anger towards him softened a bit afterwards, and she protected him and Andrew when Willow, consumed with revenge, attempted to kill them for being associated with Warren.[120] Buffy was shocked upon hearing of Jonathan's death, and showed disgust at Andrew for killing him.[184]
Sineya — The first contact Buffy had with the primeval Slayer was during a spell invoking her spirit to defeat Adam through the Scooby Gang.[95] Sineya considered it a offense, since the slayer was supposed to act alone, and manifested in Buffy and her friends' dream to punish them, and the two talked for the first time. The two fought until Buffy rejected this vision by deciding to wake up, not before mocking her appearance and demeanor. Sineya, though, cryptically left her a message warning about Glory and Dawn's arrival.[185] Buffy then sought Sineya's help on defeating Glory, who appeared to Buffy as a spirit guide and gave her two messages: telling her that her love would save the world, and that "Death is your gift."[50] Wherein Buffy initially believed this was an allusion to her dark heritage, she soon came to realize that the First Slayer was in fact referring to Buffy's sacrifice to save her sister and the world.[52] Upon learning Sineya's origin, Buffy accused the Shadow Men in her defense: "You're just men. Just the men who did this… to her. Whoever that girl was before she was the First Slayer… You violated that girl, made her kill for you because you're weak." Buffy encountered Sineya for the third time in a dream, when Sineya's message was "It is not enough."[186] Buffy later learned that it meant her powers were not enough to combat the First Evil, ultimately leading to her sharing her Slayer powers every potential.[2] A few months after the end of magic, Sineya sent messages to Buffy telling her that the Scythe was the key to reversing the damage caused by the destruction of the Seed of Wonder.[113]
Melaka Fray — Buffy was transported into the future, in which Fray was the only slayer. They had at first fought with each other, Fray believing her to be a lurk, but soon realized that she was fighting a slayer. Upon this discovery, Fray and Buffy soon grew to trust each other and bond. However, when told by the Madwoman that Fray's world would be gone if Buffy returned to her own time. Fray initially was distrustful of this but worried that she was right. This started her to fight Buffy again and stop her from returning to the 21st century. Despite her efforts, Buffy got to return to her time, and the warning was proved false as her world still existed.[112]
Eldre Koh — Originally an ally, as Buffy was the one who freed him from his prison so it was his code to be bound into obedience to her,[106] he later betrayed her and offered up Theo Daniels (Buffy's client in Deepscan) to Wolfram & Hart, telling her that vengeance on the one who had imprisoned him was much more important to him than honor. He soon after fought Buffy, only to escape as Kennedy saved Theo.[179] They later reconciled to some extent.[166]
Jordan — The Slayer briefly met Buffy while training with Kennedy for Deepscan, and considered her the best slayer. However, Buffy's relationship with the vampire Spike and initial refusal to be recruited as a peacekeeper made them enemies,[187] fighting directly when Jordan throw offensive accusations at Buffy at her home.[158] In the Safe Zone, she insisted on the recruitment, until Buffy accepted the deal of being a trustee,[188] and the two talked more amicably.[189] Jordan regained a superior posture when Buffy lose her powers to be freed,[190] fighting again when she invaded the Safe Zone headquarters, when Buffy left her unconscious.[191] After Buffy absorbed all the Slayers' powers to herself, Jordan and her friends sought her to plea for their powers back, but she understood Buffy had her right to refuse "after what we did to her." Buffy accepted sharing with her again, and Jordan promised to "use it right" and "protect people." Afterwards, Jordan left saying she wouldn't pretend they were friends, but they didn't have to be enemies either.[75]
Faith Lehane
Faith: “There's only supposed to be one. Maybe that's why you and I can never get along. We're not supposed to exist together.”
Buffy: “Also, you went evil and were killing people.”
Buffy Summers and Faith Lehane: Two sides of the same coin.
The bond that Buffy shared with her fellow Slayer was complex and unique. They understood what being a Slayer felt like, but disagreed on their role in society: Faith associated being the Slayer as freedom and power to do what she wanted, while Buffy merely saw it as a job she never truly wanted. Buffy also disagreed on the extreme violence and irresponsibility Faith had towards her job and Faith found herself arguing with Buffy often on why she couldn't enjoy and have fun with her powers.
Additionally, Faith was jealous of the life Buffy led, surrounded by friends and family, a stability she never had the chance to experience. Buffy, never one for rules herself, was somewhat drawn to Faith's rebellious nature,[159] but was horrified when Faith fell into reckless abandon and accidentally killed a man. Buffy, however, held hope that Faith can be saved and tried to help her, only for Faith rejected her help and chose to further ignore her escalating issues. Faith then became worse over time working for The Mayor, even poisoning Angel. This act infuriated Buffy and the only cure being the blood of a slayer, she headed to Faith's apartment and engaged in a vicious battle with her fellow Slayer. As Faith attempting to throw her off the roof, Buffy stabbed her with her own knife in the stomach, injuring her severely. Unwilling to "help her boy," Faith dove into a nearby passing truck, as Buffy helplessly watched her being driven away.[173] Faith survived but slipped into a coma. For the remainder of the coma, Faith and Buffy were able to share dreams with one another through the mutual Slayer powers.
Eight months into a coma, Faith suddenly woke up and fled the hospital. Buffy hoped that she would come to regret working for the Mayor, but Faith was more focused on getting immediate revenge, especially after discovering a gift from the Mayor due to his death. Buffy's lingering sympathies and hope for her abruptly disappeared as Faith continued to provoke her about her previous relationship with Angel (particularly how quickly she had re-started another relationship) and threatened to endanger the lives of her loved ones. After threatening her mother, Buffy and Faith once again fought. Ultimately, Faith won the battle when she pulled out a magical artifact for a "body swap" and knocked out Buffy in her own body, allowing her to be taken away.[91]
While pretending to be Buffy, Faith slept with Buffy's boyfriend at the time, Riley, much to Buffy's shock and anger.[92] Buffy ultimately blamed Faith for her briefly damaged relationship with him, describing her as "poison," "acid that eats through everything," and "a bomb."[93] During her time as Faith, one last battle between the two gave Buffy an insight on Faith's inner turmoil as she viciously struck her own body and insulted it.
Finding out Faith's whereabouts in L.A, she immediately came there, wanting to get revenge combined with her worry for her ex-boyfriend Angel's well-being. Buffy had wasted no time lashing out her grudge against Faith despite Faith's conscious catching up to her and feeling remorse for her crimes, which led her to try and get Angel to kill her. Buffy was deeply disturbed as well as jealous that Angel was so determined to save her (who Buffy simple saw as a lost cause) Buffy refused to forgive Faith, mentioning how hard she had tried to reach out to her only to have Faith brush her off and look down and mock her. She again reiterated her insecurities that Faith was trying to take everything in her life that she cared about and claim it as her own. Faith countered with Buffy's lack of knowledge of how her life was like. Despite her anger, Buffy protected Faith when the Special Ops forces had tried to take her in and showed no overt desire to kill her. When Faith was revealed to turn herself in for her crimes, Buffy was shocked. However, she had wanted her in jail from the beginning, she just never thought Faith would go willingly.[30]
When Faith returned to Sunnydale to help with The First Evil, Buffy accepted her as an ally and they had a tenuous alliance: while Faith was making the attempt to return to being good, Buffy had trouble getting over the past. Faith tried to follow Buffy's lead, and appeared hesitant to take over leadership after the mutiny against Buffy. However, Buffy surprised Faith by encouraging her to be the leader since someone had to.[192] The First (in the form of Mayor Wilkins) also revealed what Faith couldn't admit: She always wanted Buffy to accept her, to love her even.[62] After Buffy and the gang reconciled, Buffy and Faith discussed their contentious history, coming to the conclusion that they could never get along because two slayers aren't supposed to exist at the same time, combined with Faith making bad choices.[63] After one last fight against the First Evil, where Faith and Buffy lost their status as the only activated Slayers in the world, they parted ways.
When Buffy was transported to London by the warlock Roden in an attempt to aid the rogue slayer Geneieve Savidge kill her. Buffy jumped to the conclusion that Faith was evil again and proceeded to attack her with Faith quickly getting the upper hand and almost drowning her in an act of desperation and rage.[161] Buffy, infuriated and hurt, fell out of speaking terms with father-figure Giles following his partnership with Faith. Eventually though, when forced to lose their slayer powers, Buffy and Faith finally develop a still somewhat strained friendship.[135] Following the death of Giles, Faith openly admitted that Buffy was the "true slayer" and gave her the Vampyrslayer handbook that he had left her in his will. Buffy also trusted Faith enough to deal with Angel's catatonia when she couldn't bring herself to, the cause of Giles's death still too fresh in her mind.[43]
During her time in London, Faith confessed to Nadira that her relationship with Buffy is "complicated."[193] Later in the year, due to Dawn's deteriorating health because of the loss of magic, Buffy was forced to call Faith for some help. However, this did not work out as Faith showed ignorance of who Dawn was and Buffy had soon proceeded to hang up on her. Frustrated, Buffy irritably described Faith as "occupied and self-centered,"[42] but remained unaware of the fact that her reason for doing so was because she lost her fake memories of Dawn, an effect of her magical essence fading away.[194]
Faith and Buffy became allies once more as the government began to take away magical beings to a "Safe Zone": while offered the chance to ally with them, Buffy instead chose to stay with the imprisoned magical population and, ultimately, willingly gave up her Slayer powers in order to leave. As Buffy and Willow planned to return, due to fear of ulterior motives for draining the magic of others, Faith appeared, ready and willing to help Buffy. During this time, the two showed a much more relaxed and friendly alliance, as Buffy even let Faith wield the Slayer Scythe while powerless. After sneaking into the Safe Zone, they were caught by agents of Deepscan. Faith took on eight Slayers to give Buffy and Willow a chance to restore their powers. As Buffy regained her powers, she voiced her concern over not feeling normal while being powerless yet feeling whole as the Slayer. Faith stated Buffy wasn't normal to begin with and even praised her for being able to hold her own against slayers without any powers.
Sarah Michelle Gellar always believed her character was meant to end up with Angel, and was often legitimately emotional during Buffy-Angel scenes. In "The Prom," she could not stop crying while filming the breakup scene, and the set was closed for nearly half an hour to allow her to recover. In "I Will Remember You," David Boreanaz was actually comforting her (he can be heard whispering "Sarah") because she wanted Buffy and Angel to end up together, and was actually crying. Sarah has continued to prefer the Buffy/Angel relationship (where she calls the relationship "Love in it's truest, most pure form").
The writers have often toyed with the concept of Buffy and her best male friend Xander being a romantic couple. Xander had a crush on Buffy, but it was unrequited, with Buffy actually rejecting him when he finally admitted his feelings.[195] When Buffy found herself greatly attracted to Xander while under the influence of a love spell, she was grateful to him for not taking advantage of the situation.[118] More recently, Buffy experiences a strange dream in which she propositions Xander and kisses him on the lips, causing his head to pop off.[104] Jane Espenson claims in the DVD commentary for "I Was Made To Love You" that "it certainly was set up that the two of them should end up together." Sarah Michelle Gellar has gone on record as saying, "I honestly believe [Joss'] original intention was to put Xander and Buffy together. I really do believe that."[196]
Sarah Michelle Gellar was the one to jokingly suggest Spike become a love interest; upon hearing this Joss Whedon was initially quoted as saying "No more vampires!" Sarah was later a very vocal detractor of the Buffy/Spike relationship as it was portrayed in season 6, feeling it was degrading both to the character and the actress.
During scenes in which they were set to appear nude; James Marsters was required to wear a prosthetic sock over his genitialia. Sarah Michelle Gellar notoriously tortured him by tugging on the sock in between takes.
Joss has often spoken of the Buffy/Angel relationship as one of both true love and tragedy, confirming at a Paleo center event that while it may not have been "legal" (speaking about the age difference) that it was definitely "real" and "love."
Joss described Angel and Spike as "the two most important men in Buffy's life."[197]
Joss said the following about the shooting of the final televised scene between Buffy and Spike in the hellmouth in the Chosen DVD commentary: "I thought that this was a sort of romantic image, the two of them. We actually did it with real fire but their hands were all gelled up and you could tell, so this was added CGI, and looks beautiful. I thought it was a nice comment on their relationship. But what I basically told them was "Play the romance. Be proud of him. Love him when you say you love him. Love her when you say she doesn't love you. Forget about the crumbling world. For that period of time it doesn't exist."
Asked in an interview which of Buffy's relationship he preferred, Joss Whedon said: "You know what, I liked Spike. With Angel it’s too “Romeo and Juliet.” Which means, as soon as it happens you’re bored. Riley, you know he was a well-adjusted person who loved her in a much, much healthier way than the other two guys. Nobody wants to see that. With Buffy and Spike, they had a real Beatrice and Benedick kind of relationship, in “Much Ado About Nothing.” I think with the wedding, she would have tried to do something fast, but he would have made it elaborate and done everything wrong. It would have been extraordinarily counter-intuitive, and awesome!"[198]
Like Parker, Eddie was hinted to be Buffy's new love interest in "The Freshman" (to sway the audience from thinking Riley would take this role), only for Eddie to die and Parker turn out to only have a one-night stand with Buffy.[199]
Many scenes between Faith and Buffy are seen as homoerotic in nature and caused them to become a popular lesbian pairing: Eliza Dushku herself stated that she portrayed Faith to have a romantic interest in Buffy. According to Joss Whedon, the subtext between the two, while unintentional, was there and evident.
About Buffy finally telling Spike she loved him (Season 11), writer Christos Gage has stated: "for me, it is more about Buffy than Spike, whose feelings have been known for some time. But I think Buffy is now in a place where she can accept loving and being loved more than she perhaps could have in the past, following events like her death/resurrection, her mother's death, and her troubled relationship with her father. I feel like Buffy was in a bad place in that she was hurt, and gun-shy, and afraid to get close to anyone (romantically or otherwise), or let them get close to her, even if she wasn't 100% aware of it. And I think she's moved past that now. I feel like she ended the season in a good place."[200]
